The Survivors
by Stargate Fan
Summary: Part Four of the 'The Survivor's series. DV pairing Questions are raised about what Daniel knows and what he believes. DV pairing. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!
1. Winter Wonderland

The Survivors by Stargate Fan

Part Four in the "Canceled" series.

Chapter One: Winter Wonderland

October in Colorado Springs started nicely, with 70 degree temperatures and clear skies. But, it had been snowing in the higher elevations and winter would soon be here.

Daniel had hired a company to clean the chimneys and check the roof. The structure was sound and he had personally split enough wood to last through the winter and early spring. He didn't heat his house with fire wood but he did want to have a good supply, in case of power failure.

The encounter with the bear had served to weaken him physically, for a time, but he had worked hard and had been declared fit for duty two days before. Now, he was anticipating the next mission as he spent his days at his lab, working on translations that had piled up during his recovery, and evenings getting the house weather proofed. Splitting wood helped get him back in shape.

Vala had become an invaluable assistant in Daniel's office. Her knowledge had helped him and the others in the Archeology Department at the SGC tremendously and he was getting used to having her nearby. He smiled when he remembered how they started out on the _Prometheus_. Things sure had changed. And, for the better, too.

He and Vala were headed for the commissary for lunch and they overheard two airmen in the elevator talking about the snow storm that was predicted.

Airman Rickman said "It's not even Halloween and we're already going to get snow. Doesn't that seem kinda early?" He was new to the area and didn't know much about what was normal weather for Colorado and what wasn't.

Airman Orbanski nodded and said, "It's early but you can get snow almost any month, in the mountains. We're just east of the mountains, so if the storm is strong enough, we'll get hit, too. The forecast said 'possible blizzard.' It's supposed to hit sometime tonight."

Upon exiting the elevator, Vala linked her arm through Daniel's and said, "Daniel. What is a 'Halloween'?"

Daniel winced. "I'm sorry. I keep forgetting that you don't know many earth customs and traditions, yet. How about after work we head for the store and stock up for the storm. Then, tonight I'll explain it?"

"Good idea," she said. An evening cuddling by the fire with him was just the thing she would look forward to.

Daniel added, "I'll call Sam and Cam and Teal'c and see if they want to spend a few days there with us while the storm rages. Maybe Carolyn can make it, too. It'll be a lot of fun."

'_That isn't what I had in mind,'_ Vala thought. '_Oh well, it's better than nothing.'_

0 0 0

General Hank Landry put down the phone and called Walter on his intercom. "Chief, I just checked with the weather station up at NORAD. We've got a blizzard headed this way. I want you to contact all the team leaders and let them know that we have one team off world and as soon as they report in, I'm going to put everyone on stand-down until the storm is over. Let them know I'll need volunteers to stay here, in case of emergencies."

"Yes, sir." Walter was relieved to hear that they were going to get to spend time at home for a few days. He hadn't been able to spend much time lately with his wife and daughter and was looking forward to it.

Landry picked up the phone and called his daughter. "Carolyn, do you have any patients in the infirmary?… No?… Good. How would you like to spend some time with your dad for a few days?… Yeah, I know, it sounds like a bad storm. I'm putting the base on stand-down. I can't see having anyone driving off the side of the mountain during a storm.… Yes, I understand that we could have emergencies.… Isn't Doctor Warner coming in?… Good. I'll meet you in an hour in your office." He hung up the phone and started clearing his desk. _'Hopefully, SG-20 will come in uninjured.' _

SG-20 had gone to P27-336 for a standard trade negotiation. Reports were favorable and they were expected back within the half hour. If all worked out well, he and Carolyn could head back to his place for a few days. They had only recently started getting together to visit and there were a lot of hard feelings that they needed to talk about. When Carolyn was 12 years old, he and her mother had divorced and he hadn't seen much of his daughter since then. _'Maybe we can move ahead and become friends again.'_ He could only hope.

Klaxons blared and the gate technician announced that SG-20 was inbound. After a pause, she said, "Sir, they're signaling a medical emergency."

"Okay, open the gate and notify the infirmary." The technician got on the intercom and requested medical personnel to the gate room. Hank watched as the team came through the gate carrying Lt. Paul Blaker on a stretcher. Major Donald Ackerman was limping and came in assisted by Airman Connie Nyang. Colonel Frank Hauser looked up at General Landry and by way of explanation said, "Rock Fall, Sir. They fell about 25 feet."

Landry nodded and said, "Report to debriefing in one hour." He watched as Carolyn and a team of medics entered through the side blast doors and then frowned as Carolyn looked up a the window and said, "Sorry, Sir."

He announced through the com, "Report on the injuries when you can."

'_So much for that idea.'_

0 0 0

The members of SG-1 met for lunch in Daniel's office and confirmed that they would like to meet at 'The House', as they so affectionately called Daniel's home. Except for Cam, who, at the last minute, had things to do on the base that couldn't wait.

"You don't suppose that he's staying here because Carolyn will be here, do you?" Daniel grinned as Sam and Teal'c smiled.

Sam said, "I'm sure that's what it is. He'd better be careful. The General is staying on base, too. Carolyn said it had something to do with 'father/daughter bonding' and she said it would be nice to patch things up with her dad, so she didn't mind."

"That's good. I can't imagine what it must be like to be on the outs with your folks." Daniel had been fostered from the age of 8 when his parents died, so all he remembered of them was from a child's perspective.

Sam looked over and noticed Daniel's pensive mood. "Well, at least they're trying to work it out. I'm glad. I was on the outs with my dad for years after my mother died, and it wasn't until we called a truce that things got better. I'll always treasure those last few years with him."

"My father died when I was a young man," Teal'c said. "He taught me many important things when I was a child. One of them being that family is the strongest bond there is. I recall a time with General Carter where we discussed his estrangement with his son. It did not make sense to me, that human parents and their children would not do anything possible to nurture relationships. I was pleased to find that he eventually mended the rift."

"So am I, Teal'c. I know that it meant a lot to both Mark and my dad." Sam smiled and said, "I think maybe your talk with him, at that time, gave him something to think about. I appreciate it."

"Selmak had a lot to do with the reconciliation, Colonel Carter. I only asked a few questions."

"Well, whatever you did, it worked. Thanks."

"You are most welcome." Teal'c smiled and then looked over at Daniel. "Is something troubling you, Daniel Jackson?"

Daniel sat back in his chair and looked at each one. Then he looked down at his hands.

'Daniel?" Sam was concerned. She had noticed that when the topic came up about their parents, he grew quiet.

"I just thought of something while sitting here with all of you. We've all lost parents. I know you all care and have worried about me. My being orphaned at an early age is no secret. But, I'm not the only one here who's had to deal with loss. Vala, you lost your mother when you were a little girl. So did you Sam. Teal'c, you lost your father when you were young. I've never heard you speak of your mother or any siblings. Carolyn's parents divorced when she was a child. Cam lost his mother when he was a boy." He looked around the group, meeting each one's eyes. "We have a lot in common."

Vala reached over and took Daniel's hand. "Yes, Darling. We do. And we're all survivors." She smiled at him and he smiled back.

After a moment, Teal'c asked, "What time should we meet at The House, Daniel Jackson?"

"Well, you each have keys so whenever you can get there is fine with me." He nodded to Vala and then turned to Teal'c and Sam, "We're going to go get some groceries and then head over, right after work."

They all agreed to get there as soon as they could and then went their different ways.

0 0 0

Cameron looked up at the clock and noticed that it was mid-afternoon and he needed a cup of coffee. _'I wonder if Carolyn would like to join me?'_

He headed to the infirmary and noticed that there were a few new patients in residence.

"Dr. Lam," he said and nodded. He knew he had to keep it formal in front of the other airmen. Gossip flew around this base like wild fire on a prairie.

"Yes, Colonel Mitchell?" She went towards the doors and he followed.

He quietly asked, "Do you have time for a cup of coffee in the commissary?"

"Maybe in a few minutes. I just have to finish checking on Lt. Blaker. He hit his head in the rock fall and I want to make sure he's stable, first. I can meet you there, if that's okay?"

"Sure, whenever you can."

0 0 0

Carolyn walked into the commissary and headed straight for the coffee. She looked around the room until she found Cameron seated at a corner table and joined him there.

"You look tired," Cam said as he pulled out a chair for her.

"Thank you," she said as she sat down, "It was pretty crazy in there for a while. Ackerman only needed a few stitches and a wrap on his sprained ankle. Blaker is a different story all together. His head injury had me worried for a while but he looks okay now. He has a few cracked ribs and a concussion and he should be fine but Lt. Evans will page me if anything changes. I'm glad you stopped in. I needed a break. I can't take long, though."

"I understand. So, looks like we're stuck here on the base for a few days. I went up top and saw that it's starting to snow pretty hard."

"Yeah, Dad started sending everyone home early. It should be quiet around here for a while. When are you heading home?"

He smiled and said, "I'm not. I have a stack of reports on my desk that I haven't had the time to get through. I thought I'd try to get caught up on them, while I had the chance. What about you?"

"I had plans to spend some time with Dad, but I can't leave the infirmary now. Doctor Warner drove his car into a ditch and so dad told him to not bother coming in. I guess I'm stuck here for the duration."

Cam smiled and thought, _'Finally, a chance to get to know her better.'_

0 0 0

Daniel entered Sam's lab and said, "Sam, we're heading home early. I just talked to General Landry and he said we might as well go. Do you know when you'll be over?"

"Soon. I'm almost done here and Teal'c is already packing some last minute things. I talked to Cam and found out he can't go. He's got reports to finish so he'll stay here."

Daniel leaned on the work table and gave her a knowing look, and said, "And, I don't suppose it has anything to do with the fact that Carolyn is staying?"

Sam just smiled at him and said, "Daniel, I'm shocked! What would make you say such a thing?" He grinned and she giggled and followed him out of the lab and locked the door behind her. "See you there, buddy."

Daniel went to his quarters and grabbed his pack, which contained a book called, 'The Significance of Holidays And Their Effect on Modern Civilization. He added it to the collection he had in his pack on the subject and then left his room, locking the door behind him.

Vala was to meet him at the elevator and when he arrived, carrying his pack and his heavy winter coat and a smart looking Stetson hat, he saw that she was wearing her red silk shirt and black slacks but no outer garments.

She looked confused for a moment and said, "What?"

"Don't you have a coat?"

"Well, yes, my black leather one, but why do you ask?"

"It's snowing."

"What's snow?"

"Don't tell me you've never seen snow?"

"I don't even know what it is, so how can I tell you I haven't seen it?"

"Are you joking?"

"No, Darling. Please indulge me for a moment and explain to me what 'snow' is."

Daniel rolled his eyes and said, "You mean, after all the traveling you've done through space, and all the planets you've been to, you've never seen snow? You know, cold weather, white flakes coming down that add up to inches and make traveling risky. Snow, Vala!"

"Oh, that! It wasn't called snow on my home planet."

"What did they call it?"

She thought a moment and said, "Well, to translate it into English, it sounds like a very naughty word that I don't want to say out loud in front of present company."

She winked at the two airman walking by and they grinned as they overheard what she said.

She leaned over and whispered in Daniel's ear, only to see his face blush a very bright red.

Daniel sat his pack down and gave her an exasperated look. "Okay, from now on, it's 'snow.'

"Got it!" Vala grinned and said, "I still need a coat."

"I guess we'll have to go over to the Quartermaster and get you one. We can go shopping for your own later." He turned around and headed off in the opposite direction, Vala following, him asking questions the whole way.

"Daniel, I'm sorry if I'm so much trouble. How was I to know I would need a coat? It was 75 degrees yesterday when we came in. How could it be cold so suddenly?"

"This is Colorado, Vala. The weather here is very unpredictable. You'll get used to it."

She followed him to the quartermaster's office where he signed out a winter parka for her. "Do you need warm boots? Dumb question. Okay, we'll go shopping for them, too. Until then," he looked down and her small feet, "Jerry, give her a size 7, women's boots, please.

Jerry disappeared for a moment and then came back with a pair of warm, fur lined boots and Vala tried them on. They fit well so he said, "Thanks, Jerry. That looks like it will work, for now. Come on, Vala, before the roads get bad." He turned around and started for the elevator.

Vala looked back and shouted, "Thank you, Jerry! You were wonderful! I'll never forget your kindness!" Then she winked at him and laughed as Daniel grabbed her hand and pulled her into the elevator.

"Would you quit teasing the men on the base?"

Vala grinned and asked, "Jealous?"

Daniel seemed flustered. "No, it's just… never mind."

Vala smiled and caressed his shoulder. "My, my, Daniel. A Linguist at a loss for words!"

"Shut up!" he said and then pulled her into a kiss, that at first was an attempt to silence her, but then he decided that he would just quit thinking and enjoy the ride. The elevator started to slow down so he stopped and held her close, noticing the gentleness conveyed in her smokey gray eyes.

"Feel better?" she asked as she unwrapped her arms from around him.

"Much!" He grinned at her as the elevator came to a stop.

Upon exiting the elevator and signing out at the guard desk, they donned their coats and opened the exit doors to the tunnel, leading to the parking area. When they passed the guards, Vala saw the snow falling down and smiled. "It's beautiful!"

Daniel just smiled at her. He had forgotten how inquisitive she was and her child like awe at the weather was refreshing. _'When was the last time I was amazed by something like that, outside of work, that is?'_

"Come on," he grinned and said as he took her hand and they headed home.


	2. Silent Night

Chapter Two: Silent Night

Daniel carefully maneuvered the Jeep through 6 inches of snow down the narrow, winding road that lead into the city, windshield wipers flying and the defroster blowing full blast to keep the windows clear. As was typical for Colorado, the snow was light and fluffy, not the 'heart attack' type snow that was usual for most of the rest of the northern environs of the United States. Vala was absolutely fascinated as she looked out the slightly foggy windows of their vehicle, her head turning back and forth to take in each vista. Everything had changed so much!

He couldn't help but smile. "You're gonna get a stiff neck if you keep that up. Believe me, we'll have plenty of chances to see snow this winter. This is just the beginning."

She continued to watch out the windows and said, "Daniel! This is marvelous! I've never seen anything like it! I've been to a lot of planets but they were mostly hot, arid wastelands. Most of the time, I was only on the planet for a few hours, at best. I would land, make my deals, and get out."

"Well, this will be a new experience, then. I'll have to show you how to make a snow man and snow angels." He smiled and thought how much fun they might have.

"I think it's wonderful!"

"Yeah, well, you won't think it's so great after a few months of it, believe me." Daniel continued to drive through the white stuff and they listened to the radio for weather and traffic bulletins. The announcer mentioned that the airports were closed down in Colorado Springs and Denver and I-25 was drifting over. I-70 westbound was closed just west of Denver and the announcer said he figured that eastbound would close soon.

They stopped at a grocery store to pick up a few things and when they got to the house, he pulled into the garage and he and Vala unloaded the groceries and took them inside. She started putting the foodstuffs away and he let Tut outside and then went to the garage to hook the plow to the 4x4 Ford Pickup parked in the garage.

In a few minutes, Vala came out and watched him working on his truck. "Daniel, what are you doing?"

"I'm attaching the plow to the truck. I'll need to clear out the road so that the others can get out here without getting stuck. By the looks of things, I'll probably have to do that from time to time, in order to keep the road to the house clear."

When he was finished he let Tut back inside and he told Vala, "I'll be back soon."

She nodded and watched as he pushed a button opening the automatic garage door and then was fascinated as he backed out into the swirling maelstrom of white. She grabbed her coat and went out for a moment, watching as Daniel backed the vehicle around and then pulled out nose first, pushing the snow ahead of the blades. Within a few moments, the curve to the house was cleared and then she lost sight of him as the truck disappeared in the dim twilight flurry.

In a little while, Daniel returned and backed into the garage. He grabbed a snow shovel and went out front to clean off the sidewalks and the porch before coming back into the garage and shutting the overhead door.

As he approached the kitchen door, she brushed the snow off his shoulders and said, "You look good in that hat, Daniel." 'Actually, he looks good in anything!'

He dusted off his hat against his leg before entering the kitchen and Vala noted how handsome he looked in his black cowboy hat and dark brown suede jacket. Underneath, he wore a blue and white knit sweater and blue jeans with black cowboy boots.

He blushed a bit and said, "Thanks. I never needed one before but it helps when the sun gets hot and it's great when I'm wearing my glasses. Keeps the rain off. And, the snow."

"So, that's why I see so many men wearing them? Everywhere I look, I see men with those kinds of hats."

He came into the kitchen and grabbed a mug of hot, fresh coffee. "Out here in Colorado? Oh, yeah. The American West is pretty much like that. But you don't see many men from the midwest, Great Lakes region, east coast or south east wearing these. Except in Nashville. You'll see a lot of them there. I'll have to take you there, someday. Yup, that's about it. Mostly, in the west."

"Why is that?" Vala watched Daniel's eyes sparkle as he leaned against the door frame and switched to Anthropologist mode to explain about the cowboys and the culture of the people and their history.

He stopped and looked down, embarrassed. "I guess you didn't want to hear all about that."

"I don't mind. Really. I know so little about the Tauri and I have a lot to learn."

They moved to the kitchen table, looking out at the storm, through the windows. Daniel had the lights on in the lounge, on the other side of the house, but he had just lit a couple of decorative, scented candles on the kitchen table and turned off the lights. They could almost make out the tall pine trees on the far edge of the lawn being whipped back and forth in the wind and though it looked nasty outside, it was warm and cozy where they sat.

It was full dark when they saw head lights in the drive and Daniel hit the automatic door button for the garage. They stood, arms around each other, in the doorway to the kitchen and watched as Teal'c big Ford SUV pulled in, the big diesel engine purring. Teal'c and Sam stepped out and both exclaimed at how bad the weather was getting.

"How was the drive? I plowed it about an hour ago." Daniel wondered if he needed to get back out there and plow again.

"It was drifting over and you could just make out the edge where you'd plowed before," Sam said as she came towards the door, carrying her duffle bag.

Daniel decided that he'd better plow it again and asked if Teal'c would like to ride along. Teal'c agreed and soon they headed back out into the darkness.

Sam and Vala went into the lounge and started a fire. Daniel had already loaded the grate in the fireplace with dried wood so it was only a few minutes before they had a cheery fire going. Vala stood by the windows with a cup of hot cider and watched for the truck to return. She couldn't see much and the snow just outside the window was getting deep. Sam came and stood next to her and said, "Isn't it pretty? I always liked to watch the first snow fall. It's exciting to see the change in the season."

"It's beautiful. I've never seen this much snow before." Vala continued to watch as the white stuff flew past the windows and stuck to the shrubs next to the house.

Sam patted Vala's shoulder and said, "Don't worry, Vala. They'll be back soon. Daniel's a safe driver and he knows what he's doing."

"Worry?" She turned to look at Sam and said, "What do you mean?" This was so new to her, she'd never thought of any danger that might be involved with a snow storm.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. When the snow gets deep, cars and trucks can get stuck. It's very slippery. There's usually a lot of car accidents because of it. But, Daniel will be careful. You'll see."

0 0 0

Carolyn and Cam were chatting about their childhood's and laughing quietly.

"There were more people in the ditches than there were on the roads. Folks in Texas don't realize that you just had to slow down. You'd see some fool in a pick up truck doing 70 on the interstate and cringe when he started to spin. Most people would just stay home from work. Schools would close. It was interesting 'cause 2 inches of snow in January would be considered a nice day in Minnesota or Wisconsin."

Carolyn smiled remembering when she was 10 and her dad was stationed in Michigan. She'd had a lot of fun that winter building snowmen and sledding with her friends. "We rarely got snow days in northern Michigan. Unless it got really bad, we just went to school like always. I seem to remember that the only days school was even delayed was for fog. In the fall and spring, we'd get 2 our 3 days for that, but hardly ever for snow."

"Yeah," Cam said, "They're used to the weather up there. Ya know, I can't get used to working here is ya can't tell if it's night or day. No windows! I'm a pilot. I'm used to being up in the air. I wonder how long it took General O'Neill to get used to it."

"I don't know. I'm still working on it, myself. Well, I better get back to the infirmary. I have reports to work on."

"Me, too. See ya later." Cam stood as she got out of her chair and watched her walk away. 'She seems very nice. Calm. I guess you'd have to learn that, being a doctor and all. I'm sure she's seen her share of madness in the ER.'

He headed for the elevators and was soon at his desk, working his way towards the bottom of stack of files that he'd neglected for far too long.

0 0 0

Vala and Sam stood at the windows and soon, the lights from the truck were seen coming back down the long drive leading to the house. They could see the snow flakes flying past the head lights in the dark and saw the blade scraping snow as it approached the curve towards the house. Daniel pushed the snow off to the side before turning around and backing in to the garage. The guys worked in the garage for a little while before coming in and then Daniel hung up his hat next to Teal'c's and after they took off the coats and boots, they all settled around the kitchen table. Sam had put on a pot of chili before the guys went out, so dinner would be ready soon.

Before long, the four of them were sitting around the table with hot bowls of chili, fresh corn bread, a bowl of shredded cheese and another of diced, sweet onions. They ate their fill, cleaned up the mess and then sat around comfortably in the lounge. Daniel looked outside and decided that he could wait a bit until he went back out to clear the drive.

Vala said, "Daniel, maybe you could tell me about your holidays."

Daniel thought for a moment, "Teal'c do you know much about our holiday customs?"

"I know of them, Daniel Jackson, but I do not know their origins."

Daniel got his books out and opened them to several places. He sat cross legged on the floor in front of the fire with Vala sitting next to him. Sam sat on the hearth next to Tut, tending the fire. There were carafe's of hot coffee and cider nearby to refill their mugs. Teal'c sat in a leather easy chair facing the fire, hands clasped across his chest.

"Okay," Daniel started, "Vala, you asked earlier about Halloween, so let's start with that. It's a very old tradition that started out quite differently from what we have now." He explained about the Druids and their beliefs and how over time, the holiday changed and evolved until it was what it was today. "It's different in a lot of countries. In Mexico, the people have celebrations in cemeteries and honor their dead. In the U.S., it's mostly a fun time for the kids, dressing up and going from house to house, begging for candy."

He then went on to describe the American Holiday of "Thanksgiving," and it's origins. By the time he was done with that one, Sam had moved to a chair and was just dozing off. She sat up and said, "I'm going to bed. It was very interesting, Daniel. You mentioned some things I never knew, before."

"Well, we can wait until sometime tomorrow to talk about Christmas." Daniel was tired, too but wasn't ready to head for bed, just yet. Teal'c said 'good night,' and headed for his room.

That left just Daniel and Vala, sitting before the fire and watching the snow swirl past the windows. He stood up and looked outside and Vala joined him. There was very little to see, as the snow was blowing fast and blocking the view.

"It's beautiful, Daniel." Vala had her arms around his waist and her head on his shoulder. He held her close as Tut lay snoring in front of them on the floor, surely dreaming of chasing rabbits.

A few moments later, the power went off and Tut sat up and 'woofed'. It was dark, except for the light from the fire and a few candles and Daniel turned around to look at the darkened room.

"I have to go check to make sure the generator is working." He grabbed a flashlight from the kitchen pantry and she and Tut followed him into the garage and watched as he looked things over.

"The only things I have on right now are the furnace and the refrigerators and freezers and some lights. That should be enough for tonight. I should plow the road again. Want to ride along?"

She agreed and they went in to put on their warm clothes. Daniel opened the door to the truck for Vala and as she got in, she noticed the tires. "What did you do to the wheels?"

"Oh, when Teal'c and I got back last time, we put chains on the tires. It helps with traction. There are times during the winter when you are required to have them on if you go up into the mountains. If you ever hear the term, 'Chains Only,' that's what that means.

He went around to the driver's side and got in and then hit the button for the automatic door. It lifted up and they slowly moved forward. Right as they left the opening of the garage, Daniel lowered the plow and they slowly took off. He pushed the snow off to the side and then reversed the truck to make another pass. After a few passes, he had the parking area near the house cleared and they slowly started down the lane, pushing the snow off the side of the road. The headlights didn't shine very far in front as the blowing snow absorbed most of the light. He was careful to drive slowly and it took a while but eventually they reached the main road. Then he found a spot to turn around and they headed back, plowing as they went. It took a while but eventually they reached the house and backed the truck into the garage. Vala had been quiet during the whole trip, letting Daniel concentrate on his driving. She'd remembered what Sam had said earlier about it being dangerous.

After removing their outerwear and their boots, they came back inside and headed back to the lounge. He sat on the sofa and Vala curled up next to him and Tut sat on the floor at his feet. They quietly watched the fire pop and before long, Daniel noticed that Vala was asleep and Tut was snoring quietly. He was tired but it was so nice to just sit here in front of the fire and listen to the wind howl outside. He thought about the time after the bear attack when he was sleeping in the hospital bed in the sun room. He remembered dozing off when he heard Vala say, "Good night, Daniel. I love you." He hadn't let her know that he'd heard her. He wasn't sure what he should say or do. And, if truth be known, he still wasn't sure. Yes, they had definitely grown closer over the last few months. 'She's a lot of fun to have around, most of the time. There are times still, when she drives me crazy with her chatter and her obsession over 'treasures,' but I have to admit that I'm getting used to all that.' Her declaration of love made him pause to think. 'Do I love her? Can I take that chance and hope that nothing bad happens as it has so many times before to those I love? Am I cursed with watching my loved ones either die or be taken as a host, or both, as in Sha're's case?'

He was willing to just leave things as they were, for the time being. There were no deadlines, no reasons to rush. Things were good right now. Why take the risk?

He decided that it was time for bed so rubbed Vala's shoulders and said, "Vala, honey, it's time to go to bed. I need to get up and let Tut out and put out the fire for the night."

She moved over and laid down as he went to the fireplace and spread the dying embers around a bit. They were barely glowing as he turned to gather Vala up in his arms and headed for the stairs. He pushed her bedroom door open with his foot and carefully sat Vala down.

"Can you get yourself ready for bed?" He wanted to make sure she could before he said good night and headed for his own room.

She nodded sleepily and reached up to hug and kiss him. "G'night Daniel." He watched for a moment as she walked over to the dresser and pulled out her pajamas and then head for her bathroom. Then he quietly shut the door behind him and headed for his own room.

Tut ran ahead and found his spot on his doggy bed. Daniel took a quick shower and then crawled into bed.

Before long, quiet settled over the house as the wind howled outside and the snow piled up higher and higher.


	3. Away In A Manger

Chapter Three: Away In a Manger

Daniel woke up to the smell of fresh brewed coffee and the muffled sound of distant laughter. He stretched and then settled back in to the comfort of the Egyptian cotton sheets. He was warm and feeling lazy and tried to come up with a reason he should get up. He looked at the bedside clock and saw that it was almost 7:30 and then remembered that he didn't have to work today, so that was a bonus. Tut had nosed his way out the door and was somewhere in the house but since he smelled coffee, he was sure that someone must have let the dog out. He should get up and plow out the drive way but he hated the thought of going out in the cold. Almost as if waiting for him to think it, he heard the sound of the truck starting up. He rose out of bed and padded to the window in time to see Teal'c pull out of the garage and slowly start plowing his way out into the driveway. The view seemed magical as the snow, still coming down hard, was lit in the soft pearl gray of early dawn.

He put on his eyeglasses, pulled on a pair of jeans, a T-shirt, his robe and some warm socks and headed down towards the kitchen. There, he found Sam and Vala seated at the kitchen table over mugs of fresh coffee.

"Morning, Sleepyhead," Sam called. "Grab a mug and join us."

Daniel did just that and sat down next to Vala, who was also still in her robe and slippers.

Sam said, "Teal'c couldn't wait for you to get up. He was pacing back and forth like a caged tiger. So, I tossed him the keys to your truck and told him to go have fun."

"I heard him leave. He must feel like a kid at Christmas, just waiting to open his presents. He asked me to show him how to plow the snow last night so I'm not surprised that he's out there." Daniel took a sip from his mug and said, "He can plow the drive any time he wants. Saves me the trouble."

"Don't you like snow, Daniel?" Vala asked as she buttered a banana nut muffin and cut it in half, offering him some.

"No, remember, I grew up in Egypt. I never could get enthused about winter. The first time I saw snow, I was a kid, living with the Hendricks' in New York. I was 8 and I never could get warm. If Teal'c wants to plow, I'm all for it. Something smells good... is that scrambled eggs, or something?"

"I fixed an omelet for Teal'c before he went out," Sam said. "Would you two like one?"

"No thanks," Vala said "I'm going up to take a shower." She rose and put her cup in the sink, rinsed it out, and then headed for the stairway.

Sam sat down across from him and said, "How about you? Hungry?"

He finished the last bite of the muffin and said, "Yeah, but I can wait. Coffee tastes good, though," he said as he took a sip.

"Sleep well?"

"Yeah, I slept like the dead. You?"

Sam smiled and said, "Thanks to your stories last night, I dreamed of turkeys and pumpkins. Oh, Steven Raynor called and said to call him when you had time, but that there wasn't any hurry."

"Wow! I really must have been tired! I didn't hear the phone ring. Did he say what he wanted?"

"I was standing here making a pot of coffee and grabbed it on the first ring. He said he heard about the blizzard on the news and called to see how you were doing. He apologized when I told him what time it was here. He's in London and said he could never keep the time differences straight. Thought it was later, not earlier."

Daniel smiled and remembered the cave that he and Vala had found by accident when the bear was after them. There were drawings of hunting scenes and one section had pictures of what looked to be elephants. When he'd recovered enough, he'd called Steven and asked him to come out for a visit.

Daniel had picked him up at the airport in Denver and drove him to the hotel he was staying in. He'd offered to put him up but Steven insisted that he stay in town. He had some research to do at the Natural History Museum in Denver and then would rent a car and drive down in a few days. They had lunch and then over coffee Daniel showed him the sketches he'd drawn of the petroglyphs.

"Why did you call me in on this, Daniel? I mean, you should take credit for the find."

"I knew that nobody would take me seriously. After my theories on the pyramids, who would? So, I thought you might be interested. This is virgin territory. Nobody has been in those caves for centuries, probably. I've already contacted my friends up there and they said you could stay with them and use their place for a base, if you want to."

A few days later, Steven had gone to the cave and had carefully taken digital recordings and then called in the Archaeology Department at the University of Colorado. There was avid interest in the archaeological community about the find and research was being done. Steven had been given a grant to work the site and he'd been able to hire a team to go into the caves and begin extensive research. The 'elephant' that Daniel saw was a drawing of a Mastodon and Steven had brought in an expert on the topic. There were many artifacts found inside the caves and it was quite a success.

He's been given a lot of attention by the media and it had done a lot for his career in just the few months since the discovery had been disclosed. Steven was now a star in the archaeology world and enjoying the benefits.

"I'll give him a call later. How much snow did we get?"

"22 inches and it's still coming down. They expect it to stop tonight." Sam stood and looked out the window and Daniel came up and stood next to her.

"It reminds me of the dunes on Abydos." He remembered the way the sand would blow across the tops. He closed his eyes for a moment and brought it all back. The sun and the way the heat waves distorted the view in the distance…. The smell of the village bazaar, of the roasted goats and the spices they were cooked in along with the smoke from the braziers and the sound of fat sizzling as it dripped into the fire…. The colors of the fabrics being offered for sale – finely woven in various shades hanging from rafters and swaying in the gentle breeze…. The chatter of the women at the well as they stopped to gossip about various things. Sha're would walk with him and stop to talk with almost everyone. She knew all the families and their children. The old people's faces seemed to light up when she approached. They offered them their blessings as they stopped to inquire about their children and grandchildren. The streets were like canyons with shadows offering cooling shade in the afternoon heat. The hot brick pavement in the sunny spots made him glad for his sandals and he wondered how the barefoot children running about could stand it.

He opened his eyes and noticed Sam watching him. She smiled and said, "Good memories?"

He looked back out and said, "Oh yeah, it was nice there. Quiet and peaceful."

"Do you miss it?" She saw the wistful expression on his face and knew he still mourned Sha're, after all these years.

"Always."

0 0 0

It had been a quiet night at the infirmary. Ackerman had been discharged but stayed at the base, waiting for the roads to be cleared. Blaker was awake and alert and Carolyn thought that he would make a full recovery.

She'd had breakfast with her father in the Briefing Room and they discussed their plans for the upcoming holidays.

"Mom invited me for Thanksgiving dinner but I told her it would depend on my work load. You never know around here who's going to come in through the gate with a medical emergency."

"I might be able to pull some strings." Hank grinned.

"Don't. Please. I don't want any special privileges just because my father is the base Commander. Mom understands. She was married to you for 15 years so she knows what it's like."

Hank didn't say anything, at first. He felt bad that his marriage to Carolyn's mother hadn't lasted. The military was a hard life and the spouses and children were usually victims to the demanding pace.

Hank nodded and then said, "The forecast is for clearing skies sometime this afternoon. Maybe, if the roads get cleared off, we can get out of here and head over to my place after lunch. I have something I want to show you."

She agreed and headed for her quarters. Doctor Warner had made it in early that morning and she was officially off the clock. Since things were quiet and there were no teams off world, she planned on catching a few hours of sleep.

She saw Cam in the hallway near the elevators. "Hey," he said. "Going home?"

"No, I'm going to get some shut-eye and then go over to dad's after lunch. What about you?" They both stepped into the elevator and pushed the buttons for the floors they wanted.

As the doors closed, he said, "Yeah, I'm on my way out. The parking lot is being plowed off, as we speak. I'm gonna go see if I can find my car. It's probably buried under some drift. The airman at the gate said the snow plows have been out all night and the roads are passable. I need to get home and check my mail, pay some bills, stuff like that. Umm… Would you like to get together later? Maybe dinner or a movie or something?"

"Are you asking me out, Colonel Mitchell?" Carolyn grinned at his obvious discomfiture of her using his formal title.

"Yes, Ma'am. I guess I am." He smiled back.

"That sounds nice." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a pencil and a note pad and wrote down her cell phone number. "Call me later and we can talk about it."

The elevator door opened and as she turned to go, she smiled and said, "See ya later."

"Yup. I'll call ya." The doors closed and Cam continued the climb to the surface, thinking about where they could go to have dinner. "Yup, this is good!"

0 0 0

Vala walked into the kitchen, dressed for the outdoors. "Daniel, I'm going outside to shovel off the sidewalk. I'll be back in later." She left through the door to the garage and soon he could hear the overhead door open and Teal'c return with the truck. He heard Vala laughing and he and Sam walked around to the sun room in time to see Teal'c and Vala having a snowball fight.

"That looks like fu**n," Sam said. "Let's go out and join them."**

**Daniel agreed and headed u**p the stairs to his room and soon the four adults were outside behaving like 10 year olds, throwing snowballs and laughing. The snow was just damp enough to hold together but making a snowman was out of the question. Sam showed Vala how to make snow angels and Teal'c and Daniel were throwing snow balls at Tut, who thought he could catch them with his mouth, only to be surprised when they exploded on impact. The dog jumped through the snow drifts and chased Daniel who dodged around the yard. Before long, they were all covered with snow and red faced. It was time to come in and soon, they were all back inside shedding their warm coats, hats and gloves and slipping off their boots. They warmed themselves by the fire in the lounge, sipping hot chocolate and relaxing in front of a movie on T.V..

Lunch came and went and Teal'c went back out to plow again. Sam rode along and that left Daniel and Vala to do dishes and clean up.

When everyone was gathered again around the fire , Vala said, "Okay, Daniel. I want to hear about Christmas."

"As would I, Daniel Jackson. I have read many books and have seen many specials on your television, but I would like to hear what you have to say," said Teal'c.

"Okay, well it's a holiday that has changed a lot over the years and every country that celebrates it, does it differently, to some extent. According to the Bible, about 2,000 years ago, a prophecy was fulfilled when a baby was born to a virgin." He then went on to explain what the Bible had to say about that.

Vala was intrigued. She just loved the way he told stories.

"When the pilgrims came to America, they didn't celebrate Christmas but over time, it eventually became what it is now. It's actually two different holidays. The secular holiday involves Santa and it's believed that he brings presents to each home and he has flying reindeer that pull his sleigh through the air. Then, there is the religious aspect for those who believe it is a solemn day that denotes the birth of the Savior and redemption for all mankind who are willing to believe in Him. A lot of people keep it both ways but there are many who don't do the secular stuff, just the religious stuff, and others who won't do the religious stuff but put up Christmas trees in their homes and give gifts."

Sam said, "Yes, I have some Jewish friends who have Christmas trees and give presents."

"Right. That's the secular part that really doesn't have anything to do with the religious part. That's why some nonbelievers will celebrate it. It's just a day of fun and gift giving for them."

Vala was confused so Daniel explained who Jesus was and that there were many religions in the world that recognized Jesus as a Savior but had different ways they worshiped him. There were also many others who believed that he was a prophet or a teacher, but not the Savior.

Vala sat quietly and gazed at the fire. Then she said, "Daniel, what do you believe?"

"Well, I don't believe in Santa, if that's what you mean," he smiled a bit. "But, I do like to give presents to my special friends. I never had room for a tree at my apartment but I'm thinking of putting up a really tall one in the sun room this year. I think it would look beautiful."

"No, I mean, do you believe that this Jesus was the Savior that the others say he is?" She was really curious.

Daniel sat quietly for a few moments and then said, "I don't know, Vala. When I was a little boy in Egypt, I read a lot about all the Egyptian gods and really believed that they existed. My parents told me about Christianity, too, but I could see the pyramids and the artifacts and that seemed real to me. More real than what Christianity had to offer. Then, I came to America and saw my parents die." He paused, briefly reliving that horrible moment from his distant past. "After that, I was exposed to what the U.S. has to offer as far as the Christmas tree and presents and Santa, and all that. I went to church a few times with some of my foster families but I was pretty much left to figure it out by myself. Nobody ever demanded that I become one of them. I guess they figured it wouldn't be fair to demand anything of me because they never knew who would adopt me and what religion, if any, they practiced. But, I was never adopted so I didn't become involved in anything. I never formally joined any religion. Over the years, I didn't give it much thought. Now, after all the things we've seen out in the galaxy… all the aliens who posed as false gods out there… who enslaved people who originally came from earth, I don't honestly know what to believe." He sat quietly for a minute and then looked over and said, "What about you, Sam?"

"Well, as a scientist, I've been trained to believe in what I see. In science. But, as a person, I look around and see that there's a definite order to the universe. Something or someone had to start it all. I've studied the Big Bang theory, among others, but when I look at all the patterns and all the intricate ways that each thing depends on the things around it for order, structure, life… it makes me wonder. And even that had to have a beginning. My mother took me to church before she died. She gave me the option, I guess. I'd like to believe and honestly, Daniel… I lean toward believing that there is a God who started the whole thing. As far as a Savior goes... why not? We've seen a lot of things out there that seem a whole lot stranger than that. Teal'c? What do you think about it?"

"I have read much on the subject and it is interesting to hear what you think. Daniel Jackson, from what I've read, the Christian community believes that Jesus performed many miracles before his death, is that not so?"

"Yes, that's what is written."

"And it is said that after the death of this Savior, he was ascended. Is that also correct?"

"Yes." Daniel was starting to feel a bit uncomfortable and wondered where this was leading.

"Were you not ascended, also, Daniel Jackson?"

"Whoa, Teal'c. I'm not claiming to be the 'Savior.'"

"I was not implying that you were claiming this. I am merely pointing out that when you left, we were made to believe that you ascended, is that not so?"

"Yes, I did ascend. Your point, Teal'c?"

"If you wish us to believe that you were ascended, why is it difficult for you to believe that this Jesus is ascended and that he is who he says he is?"

"Wait, Teal'c. I'm a bit surprised to hear you say that. I mean… you, of all people, know how the Goa'uld pose as false gods. You have learned the truth. And now, when you hear about another 'god,' you think that it might be true? I would think you'd be more skeptical."

"I am not sure what to believe, Daniel Jackson. I am merely stating that we have encountered many beings in this galaxy that have powers that we cannot explain. The Ori are one example. But, we believe that there powers are real. Why is that?"

"I guess it requires faith," Daniel said, soberly.

"Indeed."

The conversation shook up Daniel a little bit and Sam could see that he was bewildered so she changed the subject. "So, what day does Christmas fall on this year?"

Vala asked, "What month does it fall in?"

"December," Daniel said.

Vala went to the calendar on the wall and flipped a few pages and said, "Christmas Day is on a Monday, according to this, and I don't know about the rest of you but I love the idea of Santa and presents! When can we get started?" She was so excited at the prospect that she could barely sit still.

Daniel could only grin at her child like enthusiasm "It's not for a few weeks yet. I'll let you know when."

0 0 0

Carolyn spent the afternoon with her father at his apartment and after a bit, he went into his bedroom and came out with a few scrap albums. As he sat down next to her on the couch and set them on the coffee table in front of her, he said, "I have wanted to show you this, ever since you came to the base, but we haven't had a chance before."

She leaned forward to look as he opened the first one. Inside was the hospital certificate that was issued when she was born. It had yellowed some and the little red seal was frayed a bit at the edges but it had her name and all the vital statistics written on it. She was surprised that he'd kept it. She turned the page and saw a picture of herself, taken the day she was born. It was a bit faded but the colors were still there, showing her wrapped up in a little pink receiving blanket. Next to that picture was a picture of her with her father, probably taken the same day. He looked so young! As she continued to slowly turn the pages and look at the pictures and other memorabilia, she noticed a lump in her throat and her eyes got a little misty. She looked over at her father and saw him quietly watching her.

She opened the next album and saw her first grade report card that had all A's listed for the year.

"You were always so smart. I never had to worry about you getting good grades." He smiled at her and pointed to a drawing she'd made of a house with three people in it, representing her with her mom and dad.

"You did this one with your first box of crayons."

She caressed the picture with her fingers and thought, 'He's kept these all these years! I can hardly believe it!'

"I have more albums. The latest one has pictures of you that were taken at the barbecue that we had at Daniel's house on Labor Day. He took the pictures with his digital camera and gave me copies."

She couldn't say anything. She never knew he'd taken the time all these years to put these albums together. As he sat back against the couch, he held his arm out and she settled in close to his side.

"You seem surprised that I made these. Your mother gave me some of the pictures. Others, she gave me copies of. Surely, you know that I care about you. I know we've had our differences over the years, and I'm sorry for that, but I love you, Carolyn. I always have, and, I wish things had turned out differently, for us. But, here we are now and we have another chance. Can we start over?"

Carolyn looked up into her father's face and nodded, tears falling from her eyes. "Yes, Dad. It's what I've always wanted. Even when I was so angry with you and mom, I wished for better. I'd be a fool to throw it away, now."

He kissed the top of her head and then reached over and grabbed another scrap album and they spent the rest of the afternoon laughing and reliving some cherished memories.


	4. It Came Upon A Midnight Clear

Chapter Four: It Came Upon A Midnight Clear

Daniel was dreaming.

He was walking through a dense forest at night and a full moon was throwing wild shadows on the ground amidst tall pine trees, swaying in the wind. A storm was coming and he could see flashes of lightning in the distance and hear the rolling thunder. He shivered as the wind picked up and debris starting flying through the night air. Ducking behind a tree, he stood still to watch the scene around him. Suddenly, in the distance, he could see a shape slowly moving through the undergrowth. It was a woman walking away from him and as he stopped to watch, she got farther and farther away. He was sure is was Sha're but then she turned to look back at him and he saw it was Vala. She was dressed in a filmy diaphanous gown and the wind made it fly around her. He called out to her but it seemed that she couldn't hear him as she turned and continued to walk away. Just before she disappeared, she turned to look over her shoulder at him. She was crying and his heart broke for her but he still just stood there and let her go. Before long, she was gone.

He woke up with his heart pounding and as he gasped for air, it became apparent that he had been dreaming. It took a while for him to settle down. He reached for his eyeglasses and got out of bed to check on Vala, who was sleeping soundly and didn't look troubled. He closed the door and went back to his room wondering what had prompted the dream. He helped himself to a glass of water, and stood at the tall windows looking out at the snow.

It was so peaceful out there. The clouds were starting to break up and the moon was full, throwing shadows across the lawn. It reminded him of his dream but there was no way he was going to go out in it.

He went over to the fireplace and started a fire, then sat across from it on the love seat. He grabbed the blue afghan that Janet had made for him a few Christmas's ago, and pulled it across his legs. Then, he sat and thought about the dream. What did it mean? Was it anything important or just his mind's way of dealing with some stress? Why had Sha're turned into Vala? Why did Vala cry and walk away? The thoughts spun around and around in his head until he finally gave up and fell asleep. And he dreamed.

0 0 0

Vala woke up hearing the sound of footsteps in the hallway- someone was softly walking towards Daniel's room. She felt like getting up to see if he was okay. It was 2 a.m. and she couldn't think of any reason for him to be out of bed. _'Maybe he had to let the dog out.'_ No, he would have done that from his deck. She got up and tip-toed to the door and opened it a crack. Nobody there. She stepped out into the hall and looked towards his room. There was dim light coming from under the door, so he must still be up. Should she go and see if he was all right? She went back inside and sat on the side of the bed, trying to think about what was the right thing to do. She laid back on the bed and dozed off. And she dreamed.

He'd been sending her mixed messages, lately, and she didn't think he even knew it. She wanted to sleep with him, be with him, but she could tell he'd been troubled lately about their relationship. She wasn't going to throw herself at him. She still teased him with a bit of innuendo once in a while, but she saw that that really turned him off. And, it wasn't really her. She used it like a weapon and he knew it. He'd actually confronted her with that fact when she'd surprised him in his quarters at the base. But, the more she'd pushed, the more he'd backed away. So, she'd been trying to let him alone and let him make the first moves. And it seems to be working. He'd been easier to get along with, these last few weeks. So, should she go to his room and see if he was okay? As a friend? Sure, why not?

She slowly headed towards his door and knocked lightly, hoping not to wake Teal'c or Sam. No answer. Maybe he was in his bathroom. She'd just open the door a bit and see if he was. She pushed it open and looked around the room. Tut wagged his tail as he looked over at her but he stayed in his doggie bed. Daniel was asleep on his love seat in front of the fire! Why? He had that great big bed! _'Something must have woke him, maybe a bad dream.'_ She silently crept towards him and saw that he was really out. _'Poor Darling. I wonder what's troubling him.'_ She sat in the chair next to the love seat and just watched. He was so boyishly handsome, when asleep. Well… he was handsome all the time, really, but when asleep, he seemed to lose the lines around his eyes and take on a youthful appearance. And those eyes! So blue, you feel like you're looking into a clear lake and could fall right in. She sighed just thinking about it and before she knew it, she was asleep.

0 0 0

Daniel opened his eyes and knew instantly that something was different. First of all, he was on the love seat. Then he remembered that he'd gotten up and had been sitting there in front of the fire. The fire was nearly out and he looked at his watch to see that it was 4 a.m.. Too early to get up and make coffee. He sat up and stretched, noticing that Tut was asleep at his feet. He got up and walked over to the windows and saw that all the stars were out and the moon has set. He turned to head back to bed and then noticed that Vala was sitting in the stuffed chair by the fireplace. _'When did she come in? I never heard her. For that matter, why did she come in?'_

He quietly walked over and knelt in front of the chair and took her hand and quietly whispered, "Vala, honey. Wake up." She didn't move and he wondered if he should carry her to her bed. _'Well, I guess that might wake everyone up. I suppose she could just sleep in mine.' _ He scooped her up and carried her over to his bed and set her back onto the mattress. After covering her, he watched her snuggle into the covers and heard her sigh.

'_She looks so peaceful, laying there. Almost as if she belongs there.' _

The thought startled him. _ 'Whoa! Hold it, Jackson! You don't want to start that. _

_Why not?_

_Because you aren't sure how you feel about her and you don't want to give her the wrong message._

_So, what do I feel about her?_

It dawned on him that he was talking to himself and he almost laughed out loud.

_Okay, get a grip! Think about this. If you allow this, she's going to think that you want a more permanent relationship. Do you?_

_I don't know, do I?_

_Do you love her?_

_I don't know._

_Do you even like her?_

_Yes, I have to admit, that I do like her. I didn't at first, but she's settled down quite a bit and she's turning out to be quite a lady._

_How would you feel if she left?_

_She already did that once when she went through the super gate, and I felt terrible. _

_Did you miss her?_

_Yes! I did._

_Okay, do you think about her when you're not with her?_

_Yes, often._ He started pacing.

_Are they good thoughts or the kind where she leaves you angry._

_Well… for the most part, good thoughts. She's really become part of the team._

_I'm not talking about the team, I'm talking about her and you!_

_Okay, Okay. Yes, good thoughts._

_Can you see building your life with her?_

Daniel had to stop for a moment. Could he? He'd been avoiding relationships because in every single case, he'd been left behind. His women either died, got kidnapped, or were ethereal beings… They'd all left him at some point. And in some cases, it was his fault. So, if he got involved with her romantically, and something happened to her…! He wasn't sure he could stand it. He'd seen her burn to death and it was almost more than he could bear. But, that was the risk with the work they did. He'd died and left the team a number of times. And he knew it hurt them. They'd told him so.

That got him thinking again about when he was ascended. He wasn't sure he remembered very much about that time but he had a feeling, a very strong feeling, that the reason he came back was because he missed his friends, his family, so much. He wasn't able to help like he'd hoped he could and he was so desperately lonely. All these years, ever since Sha're died, he'd kept himself apart from having female companionship - someone to love. Now, here he was, the chance of a lifetime to love someone, and he was afraid.

Maybe that was what his dream was about. She wasn't walking away. He was sending her away. And it was breaking both their hearts! They needed each other! Was that it?

_Okay, so go ahead and take a risk. Why keep going on like this? You know she cares about you. And if it's true that maybe she needs you and you need her? She's been alone her whole life. Just like you, for most of yours. You both have a lot in common. Remember what she said about 'Survivors.' Do you want to just survive, or is it time to actually live? It's a risk, sure, but what is your life worth, without love?_

When he got done talking to himself, he found that he was on the other side of the bed, pulling back the covers.

He took off his robe, crawled in beside her and turned on his side and closed his eyes. He was nervous but he could live with that. He smiled and drifted off to sleep. And he dreamed.

0 0 0

Vala knew something was different, the moment she started to wake up. She still had her eyes closed but knew that the sun was shining brightly on her face. She was warm and the sheets were so soft, almost like silk. Then she became aware that she wasn't alone. _'Wait a minute! I was in the chair. How did I get back into my bed? And who is in here with me?'_ She opened her eyes and saw immediately that she was in Daniel's room, in Daniel's bed, and he was there with her! She turned her head and looked around. It was 6 a.m.. He was sharing her pillow and was on his side with his arm around her. She scooted back a little bit and saw that he was sound asleep and was whispering in his sleep. She didn't have a clue what language it was but as she listened, she heard her name. That got her heart beating a bit fast. He was dreaming about her! And he wasn't angry!

She snuggled closer to him and put her head under his chin and closed her eyes. _'This is so nice. Like we belong together.'_ She laid there and thought about who she'd become and where her life was going. She felt safe with Daniel and wondered what was going on in his mind. He could have put her back in her bed. But, instead, he'd put her in his.

His breathing pattern changed and she realized that he was awake. She turned her face towards him and saw that he was watching her. He reached over and took a few strands of her hair and twirled them in his fingers and said in a low, husky voice, "Good morning." Then he kissed the top of her head and said, "Sleep well?"

They turned towards each other, legs tangled together, and she said, "Yes. Better than usual. You?"

"Mmm Hmm. I thought you'd be more comfortable in the bed than in the chair."

"You're right. I am." She played with the stubble on his chin and said, "I'm sorry if I disturbed you. I heard you get up in the night and wondered if you were okay. By the time I came in here to check, you were asleep. I sat down in the chair and was thinking and the next thing I know, here I am."

"I'd gotten up to check on you. I had a strange dream and when I woke up, I was worried, so I wanted to be sure you were okay."

"Really? That's so sweet!"

He pulled her close and said, "What am I going to do with you, Vala Mal Doran. You're starting to get under my skin."

"I don't know, Doctor Jackson, but this looks like a great place to start."

Their lips met and what started out as a sweet, light kiss turned into a breathless, smoldering infusion of passion, leaving them both wanting more.

Daniel pulled away and said, "Vala, I've been thinking a lot about us. I've been alone, for so long now, and I don't want to keep going on like that."

"What are you trying to say, Daniel?"

"I think I'm falling in love with you. No, wait. I'm sure of it! The thought of going on in my life without you in it… I don't want that. I want you a part of it."

Vala looked into his eyes and could see that he was serious. She smiled and said, "You know, I've felt the same way for a while now, but I wasn't sure what you thought. Do you think it could work between us?"

"I don't know but I'm willing to try, if you are."

"We have a lot to talk about. I know you've been hurt, Daniel. You've kept yourself apart. You don't have to anymore."

They never made it downstairs for breakfast. When they finally got dressed and headed for the kitchen, they found a note from Sam saying that the roads were clear and they were headed for the mountain to start work. He noticed that they had a half hour before they were due so they both grabbed a muffin and headed for his jeep. They made it to work, right on time, and their day began, much like usual. But, it was anything but usual and they both knew it. It was a new day and a new beginning for both of them. And for the first time, in a long time, life was good!

And then Daniel woke up.

He looked around and saw that he was alone in his bed, sun shining through the windows. Vala had never been there. He slumped back into the sheets and threw his right arm over his eyes and tried to think. It had been so vivid! So real! Finding her in his room. Debating with himself of the merits of a relationship. The conversation with Vala about their future. Making love. All of it! He jumped out of bed and headed for her room. He opened the door and saw the bed was made. She wasn't here!

When he went down to the kitchen, he found a pot of coffee had been made and a note. That said that Teal'c, Vala and Sam had already left. They knew he didn't have to be in as early as they did, so they let him sleep in. He sat at the kitchen table, drinking his coffee and thinking about he dream. Maybe he should talk to someone. Sam? Carolyn? Sam? Teal'c? He'd have to give it some thought. He took a shower and got ready for work.

0 0 0

Cam met Daniel as he exited the elevator. They were headed for the briefing room to get the specifics on their next mission.

"So, Cam, how was your stay here during the storm?" Daniel wondered if Cam and Carolyn had hit it off."

"It's was okay. I mostly stayed in my office getting caught up on paper work. I did have lunch with Carolyn a few times. Breakfast once. "

"Seriously? You should ask her out."

"Already did. We were going to meet for dinner last night but she was with her father and they were getting caught up. So, we postponed until next weekend."

They didn't realize that Vala was right behind them until she smacked Daniel on the butt and said, "Hey boys! Want to race?" She turned and walked backwards in front of them and said, "Last one there is a rotten egg." Then she turned around and sprinted down the hallway, dodging airmen as she went.

Daniel yelled after her, "Hey, no running in the halls!" He looked at Cam and shrugged and then went after her.

Cam could only shake his head and laugh.

"Hey flyboy! Sorry I missed out date last night!" Carolyn took his arm and said, "But, we could have lunch together, if you like."

Cam grinned. Things were definitely looking up!


	5. Lone Pilgrim

**Chapter Five: Lone Pilgrim**

The weeks went by and so did the Halloween party. SG-1 missed it as they were off world on a long, tedious mission to PX3-556, which proved to be a relatively useless trip. The indigenous people were friendly but were not willing to trade. It took weeks to negotiate with them and they were all tired. Vala was disappointed that they'd missed the party at the base but there wasn't much they could do about it. Instead, she decided to look forward to Thanksgiving, which was only a week away. From what Daniel had told her, it sounded like a lovely time to gather together and have a nice dinner and visit with friends.

The team met at The House the weekend before the actual holiday, along with Jack and General Hammond, who had flown in for a few days to visit his daughter and grand daughters. Daniel knew how the others had plans for Thursday and he didn't want to interfere.

He prepared an 22 pound turkey, complete with giblet stuffing, Waldorf salad, cranberries, mashed potatoes, gravy and corn. For dessert, he baked two pumpkin pies and one apple pie, to be served with either whipped topping or vanilla ice cream.

As they sat around the dinner table, which was set with fine china, silver flatware and candles, Jack wiped his mouth with his linen napkin and said, "Daniel, I'm impressed. When and where'd you learn to cook?"

"In college," Daniel said. "Well, actually before that. I learned to cook when I was fostering with the O'Rorke's. Mr. O'Rorke owned a restaurant and I spent a lot of time there, after school, watching Mrs. O'Rorke cook. She showed me how to make a lot of different dishes, from soups, to baked goods... You name it. When I went to graduate school, I got a job as a cook. The scholarships helped with my tuition and books and student fees, but there wasn't much left for anything else."

"Wow, I never knew that, Daniel. She taught you really well. This is fabulous!"

"Thanks, Sam." Daniel appreciated the compliment.

"Yeah," Jack said. "If I'd known you could cook, I would have had you do all the cooking when we were off world."

"I know. That's exactly why I never said anything."

Jack gave him a wounded look and then grinned.

Daniel explained. "I enjoy cooking but I'm glad I don't have to do it for a living. I'm not a chef, Jack. I mostly cooked fast food, but I did learn a lot. I prepared this dinner because I wanted to. When I worked in college, the hours were hard to deal with. I worked part time at 'The Stadium Club,' but that meant three nights a week and most weekends. I didn't have much of a social life. I didn't mind all that much at the time- I was taking a full load of classes and with homework and my job, I didn't have much time for anything else.

"You didn't miss much," Sam said. "Frat parties, bar hopping, watching your friends puking in the bushes outside the dorm…"

"Sam, is there a side to you we don't know about?" Jack raised one eyebrow and gave her a questioning look.

Sam blushed, "Oh, no sir, I'm just saying that it's probably a good thing that Daniel didn't go through all that. He might not be who he is now if he had. He might not have been around to open the gate, sir."

General Hammond said, "That's a very astute observation, Colonel Carter. If he'd gotten into a lot of trouble in college, he might not have gotten where he is now. And personally, I'm delighted to have him in the program."

"Thank you, sir." Daniel felt a bit embarrassed at the praise but it also made him feel good. Growing up, he rarely was given any praise. Some of his foster parents were fine but most either ignored and neglected him or abused him. The O'Rorke's were the rare exception and he had a lot of fond memories of Mrs. O'Rorke showing him how to cook. She treated him like one of her own children and never made him feel otherwise.

After coffee and dessert, General Hammond said, "Well, Daniel… I'm sorry to eat and run but I promised my grand daughters that I would stop by and visit before they went to bed, so I'd better go. Thank you for inviting me, son. I had a wonderful time."

"You're welcome, sir. I'm really glad you could make it." He got up and went to the hall closet in the foyer and helped the older gentleman with his over coat. The others followed him to the door and Hammond shook hands all around and then turned to go.

They returned to the table and everyone cleared it and got the dishes done. Then, they went into the living room where Jack settled into the leather chair, grabbed the remote and turned on the big screen TV to watch the game.

"Who's Detroit going to lose to this year, Teal'c?" Jack grinned as he put his stockinged feet up on the coffee table.

"The Green Bay Packers, O'Neill."

Daniel looked up, surprised, and said, "Teal'c, you know about football?"

"Indeed, Daniel Jackson. I find it resembles a game we played on Chulak. The strategy is similar to our warrior games. We also had a team that often lost."

"What were they called?"

"They were called 'Losers,' Daniel Jackson." Teal'c smiled and steepled his fingers as O'Neill grinned and flipped the channels, trying to find the game.

"Of course they were." Daniel smiled and sat back on the couch.

"Sam, what's he talking about?" Vala didn't know about football.

"Well…It's tradition that the Detroit Lions play against another team every Thanksgiving. And they hardly ever win, so it begs the question. 'Who are they losing to?' Get it?"

"I see. Why do they fight Lions? Isn't that dangerous?"

"It's just the name of the team, Vala. They don't really fight Lions. Hey, I'm going to go for a swim. Want to come along?"

"Absolutely!" They headed for their rooms to change.

0 0 0

Vala noticed upon entering the pool area that Daniel had a few weight machines set up at the end, by the windows. There was also a rack of free weights and some mats set about.

Sam showed her how to do some exercises with them and then they went swimming. Afterwards, they were sitting in the whirlpool and Sam noticed that Vala seemed very quiet.

"Is something wrong, Vala?"

"Why do you ask?"

"I've noticed that you've seemed a bit distant lately. Daniel hasn't actually been his usual optimistic self, either. You were awfully quiet at dinner."

"I want to move back to the base."

"What!? Why?"

"Well, for the last few weeks, Daniel has hardly spoken a word to me, outside of work. He's been polite but I get a distinct feeling that he regrets giving me a room here."

"Have you tried talking to him?" Sam knew that Daniel had a lot of issues but she thought he'd worked his way through most of them. He'd seemed happy here with Vala and it was upsetting to find that he wasn't.

"Yes, Sam, I've tried. He says it's something he's got to work out and not to worry about it. So, I think that until he works it out, I'll stay at the base and give him some breathing room."

"Do you want me to talk to him?"

Vala got out of the pool and said "No. It won't do any good, Sam. You know how he is. When he's ready, he'll say something. Until then, he knows where to find me."

Vala grabbed her robe and headed for the door. "Do you think you could give me a ride to the base tomorrow?"

"Are you sure?"

"I've given it a lot of thought and I think it's the best thing to do. Please don't tell Daniel. I'll talk to him about it."

Sam nodded and then sat there for a few minutes totally stunned. Daniel was like a brother to her. She'd loved him for years and couldn't stand the thought that he wasn't happy. Vala had been annoying, at first, but she'd become a real part of the team and Sam had come to appreciate her wit and strength when things got tough. Vala didn't back down. This just didn't seem like her.

She got out of the pool and headed back to her room.

0 0 0

The guys had settled in to watch the game and before long, two of them had nodded off. Teal'c was the exception and he found the game very interesting. It was half time when he noticed Sam heading for the stairway and saw her signal to him to come over to her. He quietly left his seat and walked over.

"Is there something I can help you with, Colonel Carter?"

"We need to talk. Can you meet me in the lounge in 15 minutes?"

"I will be there."

"Thanks, Teal'c." Sam headed for the stairs and Teal'c turned to see that Daniel and O'Neill were still asleep. He walked over to the lounge and got a fire started in the grate. When it was burning nicely, he closed the glass doors and then sat back on the leather sofa. Before long, Sam came into the room and shut the door behind her.

She sat across from him and said, "Teal'c, have you noticed anything wrong with Daniel, lately?"

"He has been quiet for some time now, Colonel Carter. I cannot tell you why."

"You can't or you won't."

"Daniel Jackson and I have talked and I do not feel it is within my rights to divulge the topic of our conversations."

"Okay, tell me this. Is he unhappy?"

Teal'c sat still for a moment and seemed to think about it.

"Never mind, Teal'c. You just answered my question."

"Samantha, why do you ask?"

Sam was slightly taken back by Teal'c use of her first name. He only did that when he was worried.

"Vala's moving out. I'm taking her to the base tomorrow. You can't tell Daniel. She said she'd do it, herself."

"Has Vala Mal Doran said why she is moving out?"

"She said that she wants to give Daniel some time to think. He's upset and she knows it but he won't tell her why."

"I am sure that Daniel Jackson will work things out in is mind and try to resolve his issues. Do not be afraid, Samantha."

"It's hard not to, Teal'c. You know how much Daniel has been hurt in the past. I want him to be happy and when he's not, I want to help."

"You must trust him, Colonel Carter. He will do the appropriate thing."

Sam squeezed his hand and then they headed back to the living room. Daniel had just woke up and was rubbing his face. "Anyone want some coffee?" He headed for the kitchen to make a fresh pot and Sam and Teal'c sat down to watch the second half of the game. Jack woke up, looked around the room and then headed for the kitchen. A few minutes later, he came out and said, "Anyone want another piece of pie? Daniel said if we don't eat it, he's gonna feed it to the dog."

They heard Daniel yell from the kitchen, "I did not! Don't believe him!"

Sam laughed and said, "Sure, I'll take a small piece. What about you, Teal'c?"

"I will refrain, for the time being, O'Neill."

Daniel came out of the kitchen with a tray of mugs, sweetener, creamer, dessert plates and forks. He left and then returned with the pot of coffee, setting it on a hot plate on the coffee table.

"Where's Vala?"

"In her room," Sam answered. "We took a swim and she went up to change."

Daniel nodded and watched as Jack came out of the kitchen carrying two pies.

They helped themselves to dessert and sat back to watch the game. After a bit, Daniel said, "I'm going up to see if Vala is okay. Be back in a few."

Sam glanced at Teal'c and neither one said anything. They just watched their 'brother' head for the stairs.

0 0 0

Daniel noticed that Vala seemed distant today. Maybe it was the fact that they'd been working hard and been off world a lot, but he wasn't sure. He approached her door and saw that the light was on. He knocked quietly and heard her say, "Come in."

He turned the knob and stepped inside, saying, "Vala, we're having some dessert, would you..." He saw that Vala had a suitcase open on the bed and was putting some of her things in it.

"What are you doing?" He felt suddenly very afraid and sat down on the other side of her bed.

Vala looked at him and then quickly looked away. "I'm packing, Daniel. I asked Sam to give me a ride back to the base in the morning."

He was upset that Sam had been sitting downstairs and hadn't said anything. He pinched the bridge of his nose and said, "What's going on? Why are you leaving?" He looked up at her and watched her cross the room.

She sat down on the chair by the window and said, "Darling, listen. You need some space. So do I. I don't know what happened to you, but a few weeks ago, you suddenly grew distant. You won't talk to me, you won't touch me. I'm sorry, but until you figure out what the problem is, I'm going to stay at the base. We'll see each other at work but I'll work with Doctor Ferguson and Doctor Lee until you figure it out."

He got up off the bed and knelt in front of her on one knee. "Vala, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to shut you out. I've had a lot on my mind lately and I'm sorry that I haven't talked to you about it."

She caressed his face and said, "That's fine, Daniel. Look, I'm not mad at you, okay? But, I feel like something is wrong and we spend almost all our time together. We work together, we eat all our meals together, we live under the same roof. I ride to and from work with you, most of the time. I get a distinct feeling that you need some space." She stood and turned to look out the window. "If I get out of your hair, you'll be able to think clearly. When you figure out what's wrong, and how to fix it, let me know. You know where I'll be. Now, if you don't mind, I want to get some things done and then go to bed."

Daniel was speechless! He quietly turned around and left her room, silently shutting the door behind him. He walked down the hall to his bedroom and went inside. He didn't turn on any lights as he crossed the room and sat down on the edge of his bed. He needed to think.

Ever since he'd had the dream about he and Vala declaring their love for each other, he'd been upset. He realized that he hadn't been fair to Vala. He'd slept with her at the Bed and Breakfast, during the summer, but he'd had nothing much to do with her, sexually, since then. He grew comfortable having her at work and appreciated her being there, but he'd stalled out, where his emotions were concerned, and let things between them die. It certainly wasn't fair to her, but he didn't know what to do about it. He cared for Vala but he was still afraid that if he decided to have a relationship with her, something bad would happen and she'd disappear. He didn't think he could stand that happening again. So, if he just left things the way they were, nothing bad would happen. Now, he realized that he'd made a big mistake, but what could he do to fix it?

He felt foolish, like a school kid with his first crush. But, he knew it was more than that. He was not a kid. He was a grown man with feelings that he'd not allowed himself to have since Sha're had died. He'd dated a few times, but only when someone well-meaning had insisted and had set him up with a woman who they thought he would like. He'd gone on the dates as a favor but he never allowed himself to date the same woman a second time. He didn't want to give them the wrong impression that there was any hope for anything more. He kept his heart closed off and felt it was the only way he could go on, day to day. He had been satisfied that he could continue on that way indefinitely, if need be.

When Vala showed up at the SGC and shamelessly flirted with him and all the other men on the base, he didn't think too much of it. Not at first. She'd been all talk and he knew it. She made suggestive remarks and basically drove all the men crazy with her outrageous apparel and improper advances, but he chose to ignore most of it.

It all came to a sudden stop one day, when Daniel walked into the locker room and heard some of the men talk about what they would do with her, if they only had a chance. He blew up when he realized who they were talking about. This was right after the bracelets had been removed but before she had been pulled into the singularity and transported to the Ori galaxy. He told them all just what he thought they could go do with themselves and stormed out.

She was so ashamed that when Daniel came out, she was standing in the nearest corner, unable to face him. She'd heard what the guys had said to him and how angry he'd become. It had gone too far and she felt terrible. Up until that time, she'd thought they all understood that she never meant anything by all the teasing. It was all in fun. Now, she found out just how serious it had all become and she was mortified that Daniel had been stuck in the position of having to defend her.

For Daniel's part, when he saw her standing in the corner, he went to her and turned her around and said, "We need to have a talk, right now!" He took her by the hand, led her down the hall to Dr. Lam's office, which was empty at the time, sat her down, and read her the riot act! "You will stop all the teasing RIGHT NOW! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!" He went on from there and explained that the SGC was not her personal playground. That the work done there was extremely serious and there was no room for her antics. She needed to understand that the men and women who worked there deserved her respect and that they did not deserve to be abuse by her. And yes, it was 'abuse,' and that he thought it was extremely rude of her to treat them that way.

When he got done, he sat down behind Carolyn's desk and glared at her. The tears in her eyes almost broke his heart but she had to know how her fooling around was affecting the workings of the base. He was sure that General Landry hadn't heard anything or he would have had her thrown through an event horizon at the first hint.

She sat quietly for a bit and then apologized. Her face had gone white as a sheet and she realized what a big mistake she'd made. She left the room and went to her quarters and didn't come out until lunch time. Daniel went to his room, across the hall from her, and tried to work on a translation, but he couldn't concentrate. He got up a few times and went out into the hall, intent on knocking on her door and telling her he was sorry for yelling at her. But, he decided to let her cool off, first. When she came out of her room at lunch time, she followed Daniel to the commissary and stood in the center of the room and asked for everyone's attention. Then, as sincerely as she could, she apologized to the whole room. It was very crowded that day as 6 SG teams had returned through the gate that morning and they were there, along with a large number of the administrative staff. She said, "I realized that my behavior has been reprehensible and I apologize for my words and actions. I never intended to insult each of you and for that I am truly sorry. Please forgive me." She was close to breaking down as her hands fluttered to her mouth so she turned around and walked quickly back to her room with Daniel almost running behind her to keep up. When she got to her room, she locked the door and wouldn't let him in. She said that she needed time alone. Daniel thought about it for a moment and then turned and left. He headed straight for the base kitchen and soon was back at her door with a cart, carrying two covered dishes. Daniel knocked on the door.

"Vala. I have lunch here. Please, open up and let me in. I want to talk to you and explain why I did what I did. Please?"

He knew she'd heard him and he waited patiently for her to open the door. When she did, she stepped back as he wheeled in their lunch. She closed the door and watched as he went over to the table, placed their covered dishes on it, and then, from the shelf underneath, took out a vase with a rose in it, and two candles. He lit them and then pulled her chair back and waited for her to approach. She looked up at him and he almost lost it! Tears were running down her face as she stood before him and said, "I'm so sorry, Daniel. Please forgive me."

He reached for her and when she came to him, he enveloped her in his arms and told her he was sorry that he'd yelled at her but he'd had to make it very clear to her what a negative effect she was having on the personnel on the base.

They spent an hour with each other and as he explained to her what was happening, she clearly understood how harmful her behavior had been. He assured her that everything would work out and then left.

Daniel reported to General Landry after his lunch with Vala and Landry decided to call a meeting in the gate room. Vala was there, standing next to SG-1 and kept her poise. Landry told the staff that he would not tolerate the kind of remarks and behavior that had been going on between the men and the women on this base. That it amounted to sexual harassment and that it would stop now! He looked Vala right in the face and said that if he heard anything more about it, he would have the people involved shipped to Alaska for latrine duty. She understood.

After they were dismissed, some of the men glared at Vala but Daniel was standing right next to her and when they saw his face, they turned away. The men who had a personal problem with Vala were talked to by Cam and Daniel. Occasionally, some grumbling would start and Teal'c would show up and the talk would stop. Eventually, the whole incident was put 'on the back burner,' and things returned to normal.

That was the beginning of a new understanding between them. She still teased Daniel a little bit, now and then, but she really toned down her behavior around everyone else and things settled down.

Soon after that, she was gone and they didn't know if they would ever see her again.

Daniel sat in the darkness of his room and remembered the events. He remembered how he felt when he realized that she hadn't used the ring transporter in time to return to the ship and that she'd disappeared. Those around him saw his knees buckle and thought that his weakness was from the residual effects of the marriage bracelets. He let them think that, and it was partially true. But, truth be known, when he realized what had happened and that she was gone, possibly dead, he was overwhelmed with grief. They had just reached an understanding and now she was lost. It was almost more than he could bear.

When he found her on the Ori ship, he barely had time to acknowledge his feelings. Things were happening so fast and they were in terrible danger. He had a suspicion that things had gone badly for earth and it's allies during the battle but he didn't know how bad it was until Vala told him what she'd witnessed. She was sure that he'd died and she couldn't tell him if there were other survivors. It wasn't until he heard from Sam that he knew the truth. After that, things got dicey and they almost didn't make it off the Ori ship alive.

He remembered how he felt when they finally had a few moments of privacy and he could tell her how happy he was that she was all right. He knew she was a bit in shock, after all the event happened with Adria, but she was holding up remarkably well. She worked hard and had become part of the team. He was proud of her and told her so.

When she'd been kidnapped and lost her memory, he became almost desperate. She'd beaten the odds before and returned, and he had to think that she could do it again. But, he was terrified! When they found her, he held her and it dawned on him how important she'd become to him. It scared him when he realized how he felt for her.

And now she was moving back to the base. Would they ever work things out between them?

0 0 0

Vala sat by the window, held her head in her hands and quietly wept. She'd been afraid that this was going to happen. She'd allow herself to care for someone, love someone, and it would all fall apart. She'd grown fond of Tomin but she realized that that whole marriage had been a sham. It was an Ori plot to produce her daughter, the Orici, and she felt angry, betrayed and hurt. When she came back and moved in with Daniel, she was sure that things were finally looking up. Sure, that finally she'd found a home, a secure and loving place where she could finally stop running.

When she'd been found in the warehouse by SG-1, and more specifically, Daniel, she'd suddenly remembered him, who he was and how much she'd grown to care for him. He'd told her it was time to stop running and to come home. She'd believed him and she was sure he'd meant it. But, as time went on, he grew more distant and she grew more confused.

She took a deep breath and quietly said to herself, _'Well, maybe if I give him some space, he'll figure out what he wants. I only hope his plans include me.'_

She crawled into bed and tried to sleep, but sleep wouldn't come.

Down the hall, Daniel had taken a shower and had gone to bed. As he lay in the darkness, unable to sleep, he wondered, _'How did things get so messed up?'_


	6. These Broken Hearts

Chapter Six: These Broken Hearts

Daniel tossed and turned most of the night and no matter what he tried, he couldn't sleep. The thoughts of his conversation with Vala were buzzing through his brain like a tape recorder on 'play' and then 'rewind.' 'Play' and 'rewind, over and over again.

Around 5, he heard movement in the hallway and waited. Soon, the sound of a car engine was heard and he knew she was leaving. He got out of bed and looked out the window. Sam's car was seen heading down the lane towards town. He walked over to Vala's bedroom door and looked inside. There was just enough light coming in the window to see that the bed was made and the room tidied up. She was gone.

On the dresser was an envelope with his name on it. He took it back to his room and closed the door behind him. He started a fire and then sat on the love seat and opened the note.

"_My dearest,_

_I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused you since I've come to earth. I've given this a lot of thought and this decision is one of the hardest I've ever had to make. I'm going to ask General Landry to let me leave earth. I'm sure that it's for the best. _

_I love you, Daniel. I always will. You've shown me so much of what it means to be a decent, loving person. You are a rare gem, a brilliant star in the night sky. You mean so much to me that I cannot completely express how I feel. _

_I will be in touch. I thought I could stay at the base and work in the Language Department, but it would be too painful. Please, give me some time to think. Give yourself some time, also. I will contact you in a few weeks and let you know where I am. If you want to meet me, we can make arrangements. Until then, I think this is for the best._

_All my love,_

_Vala _

Daniel was completely stunned.

0 0 0

When Daniel finally went downstairs, he found Teal'c and Jack sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee. Neither one said anything as they watched him grab his jacket out of the closet and get his keys out of his pocket. "I'm headed for the base. I'll see ya later."

"Daniel," Jack said. "Sit down, please. Teal'c told me what has been going on. I think we should talk."

He turned back to look at Jack and said, "About what? She's gone. I drove her away. Period."

"No, it's not that simple, and you know it!"

"It is, Jack. I've been so afraid that something would happen to her, that if I admitted that I cared about her, she'd die, or get captured, or something, that I closed myself off from her, thinking that things could just go on the way they have been. And look what happened… I caused her to do the thing I feared the most. She's going to ask Landry to leave earth. It's over, Jack!" He turned around and left the kitchen, closing the door to the garage behind him.

Jack looked at Teal'c and neither one said anything as they heard the automatic garage door open. They heard Daniel's Jeep start up and pull out. Seconds later, the door closed and it grew quiet.

"I'm calling Landry. He can't let her go until those two get this straightened out." Jack reached for his cell phone and made the call. "Hank, it's Jack. Yeah, I know it's early. I'm sorry. Look, Vala's upset and left here a little while ago. She's evidently going to ask you to let her leave earth. Stall her, please? … I'm not sure of the specifics. … No, I guess they haven't been getting along. … No, not fighting, just … Look, I'll explain when I get there, just don't let her go. …Okay, I'll be there soon."

Teal'c shut off the coffee maker and grabbed his coat. They headed to his SUV and headed in towards town.

0 0 0

Sam drove through all the check points without incident. Vala hadn't said a word the whole time they were driving in to work and Sam was worried. When they got to Level 16, Vala thanked her for giving her a ride and headed for her quarters.

Sam watched her head down the hall and then got back into the elevator and headed for level 27. She went to General Landry's office and knocked on the door.

"Come."

After entering the office, Sam noticed that Landry was on the phone and knew within seconds that he was talking to Jack.

He hung up the phone and said, "Would you please tell me what the hell is going on? I just talked to Jack and he said Vala wants to leave Earth!"

"I didn't know that, sir. She told me she wanted to come back to the base. She thinks Daniel needs some time alone to think and that she's in the way."

"Listen, Colonel… I'm almost ready to open the gate and throw her through it! She's been nothing but trouble since she got here. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt because Daniel asked me to take a chance on her. And admittedly, she's been helpful, at times. But, if those two are having a lover's quarrel and it's going to effect the work they do here… then I'm about ready to let her go!"

"Sir, I don't know what to tell you. Daniel's been a bit moody lately but he's been 100 here when it comes to getting his work done. Vala's been a great help and I don't think it's effected her work, either. I think they need to talk, but neither one knows what to say. He's afraid to get close to her for fear of something bad happening, and she's afraid to push him any further."

"What they need is a good kick in the pants! Both of them! I have a lot of respect for Doctor Jackson. He's the reason we have this job, for heaven's sake. But, this is gonna stop! Today!"

He punched a button on his phone and said, "Walter, I want you to let me know the instant Doctor Jackson arrives. General O'Neill said that he's on his way. As soon as he gets here, have him come to my office."

"Yes, sir."

"Colonel, I want you to go get Vala and bring her here."

"Yes, sir."

Sam left the office and headed to the elevators. Upon exiting on level 16, she turned right and headed for Vala's room. She knocked on the door and Vala opened it.

"Sam, what's up?" Vala could see that Sam was anxious and wanted to know why.

"Landry wants you in his office. You'd better hurry."

She nodded and followed Sam to Landry's office and knocked.

"Enter." Hank saw that Sam had Vala with her and said, "Vala, please come in. Sam, thank you. You're dismissed."

"Yes, sir." Sam turned and headed to her lab. _'Man, I'd love to be a fly on that wall!'_

Hank closed the door behind Sam and then sat behind his desk. He watched Vala for a few seconds and then said, "Vala, I understand that you and Doctor Jackson have had a falling out."

She didn't know what to say so she just sat quietly.

"I don't know if you know very much about Daniel. He's not one to blow his own horn so you probably only know what others have told you. Let me fill you in a little bit. Daniel was orphaned when he was 8 years old. Did you know that?"

"Yes, sir, though I don't know the details."

"Okay, he watched both his parents get crushed to death by a cover stone.

Vala was shocked and Hank could see that this was news to her. She'd gone very pale and tears welled up in her eyes. He handed her a tissue and continued.

"They were archaeologists, like him. Very well respected. When he witnessed their deaths, he became catatonic. He didn't speak for months. He was hospitalized for a long time and it wasn't until he was almost 9 years old that they finally figured out what a genius he was. He was placed in foster care. Do you know what that is?"

"Yes, sir. Sam mentioned that it wasn't a good experience for him."

"No, it wasn't. It's amazing that Daniel is the fine man that he is. It attests to the strong, moral character that he has, that he was able to overcome the disasters in his life."

"Yes, sir."

"He started college when he was 12 years old. Most people don't get to start until they're about 18. He got his first doctorate when he was 17 and his second and third when he was 19. He's brilliant, Vala."

"Yes, I know that, sir."

"In 1929, in Giza, Egypt, which is on the other side of this planet, the Stargate was found buried in the sand. Nobody knew what it was and nobody could figure it out. In 1945, scientists got it to work on it and then promptly lost the first man that traveled through it. The project was mothballed and the gate was stored away. It was 50 years before it was opened again. And the only man who could figure out what it was and how to use it was Daniel Jackson. There were scientists who had been given the go ahead to figure out what it was and after years of working on their theories, they were stumped. It only took Doctor Jackson two weeks and he had the problem solved. Did you know that?"

"No sir. Nobody told me the gate's history."

"And you never bothered to ask, did you?"

"No, sir." Vala hung her head in embarrassment. She knew that this looked like she was self-centered. Why hadn't she asked?

"Since, then, Daniel's contribution to this project has been invaluable. He's been responsible for the treaties between earth and so many other planets, I can't count them all. His language skills alone have gotten our butts out of hot water more times than I care to count. Did you know that he was married to a woman from Abydos and that she was taken by a Goa'uld, made a host, and that Teal'c was forced to kill her? She'd been forced to become the host of Amonet, Apophis' queen. She tried to kill Daniel and she almost succeeded. If Teal'c had been a few seconds too late, Daniel would be dead instead of her."

"I didn't know that." Vala's mouth went dry at the thought.

"No, I suppose you didn't. Mind you, this was a few months after Daniel was with her when he delivered Apophis' son, whom she had given birth to."

Vala remained quiet. She didn't know what to say.

"After Sha're died, Daniel continued working. He'd promised Sha're that he'd find her son. That's another long story. After Shifu was found, Daniel seemed to drift. Did you know that he'd died from radiation poisoning five years ago?" Landry watched Vala's face turn white with shock. "I didn't think so. It was a horrific death. He literally was bleeding to death. Before he almost died, he ascended. From what General O'Neill has told me, Daniel came to him, in a trance, and asked them to let him go. They did and that next year was one of the worse years this project went through. It's a miracle that the rest of SG-1 was able to function. It's only because of their dedication and self-discipline that they worked through their issues. If not, we probably wouldn't be here now, discussing this. A year later, Daniel was found on another planet with total amnesia and it took a long time for them to figure out what had happened. It seems, he couldn't stop interfering so they virtually threw their fish back. It was a long, confusing time for him but eventually, he made the recovery. Vala, the reason I'm telling you this is because we can't afford to lose him. He means too much to this program."

"Yes, sir." Vala kept her eyes on the floor, afraid to look up.

"I want you to understand something. He's been hurt a lot. But, he's the strongest person I've ever met. And yet, he has his limits, like the rest of us."

"Yes, sir."

"I want you to tell me what's been going on with you and Daniel. I understand that you have both had some differences."

Vala didn't know where to start. She decided that the only thing she could do was lay it all on the table and leave nothing out. So, she did.

"Sir, I thought I could contribute to the program here at the SGC. I thought that my knowledge of the Goa'uld and the other cultures out there would be valuable to the work here."

"And, it is."

"Thank you, sir. Lately, Daniel and I have grown apart. We had a bumpy start to begin with, and I admit that it was my fault. But, we seemed to work things out and work well together. Lately, things have changed. He is unhappy with me and I feel it would be best if I went away. I can still help the SGC by sending you any information that I can find on the Ori. I can still work from a distance. I just don't think it's beneficial for the SGC to keep me here any longer.

"I'm almost ready to agree but I think you should let me be the judge of that."

Vala looked contrite. "Yes, sir. I'm sorry."

"I appreciate your honesty, Vala. That's why I asked you to come here. I want you to honestly tell me what you think we should do to resolve this. Besides your leaving, that is."

"I don't know, sir. Daniel's upset. I've tried to be patient but he won't tell me what's wrong."

Hank sat quietly for a moment. _'I never thought I would ever have to do 'marriage counseling,' in my line of work. They may not be married, but they sure act like it.' _"I want you to go to your quarters and stay there until I call for you. Am I understood?"

"Yes, sir." Vala left and headed straight to her room. _'What's next? I could just scream! I just wanted to go and now, I'm stuck here! Oh, Daniel, I'm afraid I've just made things worse!'_

Hank sat back in his chair and tried to think what he could do to fix this. _'Maybe I should just lock the two of them in a room and tell them they can't come out until they fix things themselves! Actually, that's not a bad idea!' _


	7. Don't Leave Me This Way

Chapter Seven: Don't Leave Me This Way

Daniel took his time driving into town. It was only 5:45 and he didn't have to report to work until 8. There were no missions scheduled for SG-1 today, so he wasn't in any hurry. He stopped at the scenic overlook to view the city lights. He sat on the hood of his Jeep and tried to make sense of everything.

He knew with every cell in his being that he couldn't let Vala go. '_But, how do I convince her to stay? I've really messed things up! What am I going to do?'_

He thought about the talk they'd had last night and how distraught she was. She was right, he knew that. He hadn't been fair to her and maybe he had led her on. He didn't mean to and if he'd been thinking straight, he never would have.

When they'd spent the night at the Bed & Breakfast during the summer, he hadn't meant for things to go on the way they did. There was only one room, one bed. They both tried to ignore the other, their backs to each other. _'I could no more ignore her than I could ignore a charging rhino!'_ He smiled a bit over their reaction. They had both started to laugh and the next thing they knew, they were in each other's arms. Making love to Vala was one of the most incredible experiences he'd ever had. Well… to be fair, he hadn't made love to many women. His wife, of course, but that was mostly it. Oh sure, he'd had a few encounters in college, but he didn't consider that 'making love.' That was sex, pure and simple. Sarah was another story. They were definitely attracted to each other, and the sex was great, but he didn't find himself making an emotional connection with her as much as she did with him. She thought it was more and he learned the difficult way that women don't view sex the same way men do. Most women see it as a fulfillment of a commitment. Men don't necessarily feel that way. After Sha're died, he decided that he didn't want to lead any women on. He wasn't ready for a serious relationship. He'd found his one and only and he never thought that lightning would strike twice. And, for a long time, it hadn't.

Hathor had raped him and that had turned him off for a long time. The thought of being with another woman would bring back nightmares, so, he didn't allow himself to get become involved. He sought counseling with Dr. McKenzie and that helped some but then the incident with Shyla happened. She used him the same as Hathor did. Her motives were different, but it was rape, just the same. Talk about nightmares! His sarcophagus addiction took a long time to recover from and he'd almost killed Jack in the process. After that, he resolved to stay celibate for eternity. Over the years, he grew satisfied with his life. He kept busy at work and he didn't take the time for much else.

Then, he met Vala and everything changed. Granted, she was abrasive, coarse, vulgar… the list goes on. She could make a marine blush with the things she'd said. He knew for a fact that she had! And yet, the longer he knew her, the more he liked her. Especially since he'd talked to her about her behavior. She really did seem to settle down. He had to admit, he hadn't felt this alive in years!

_'How could I have been so stupid? I better get to the base and see if I can find her so we can talk. And, it's not gonna happen with me just sitting here freezing my tail off.'_ He got back in his car and headed for Starbuck's to get his favorite morning wake-me-up and then he would go face the music.

0 0 0

Jack and Teal'c pulled into the parking lot at the mountain and noticed that Daniel's Jeep was nowhere in sight. "Okay, Teal'c, where would he go?"

"I do not know, O'Neill. Maybe he stopped for breakfast at the International House of Pancakes."

"IHOP? Maybe. Well, we can sit here and wait for him or we can go inside. Or, we could go look for him."

"I think we should leave Doctor Jackson alone, O'Neill. He knows where to find us if he needs us. It might be good to give him his space."

"Okay, but if he doesn't show up here by 7, I'm going after him."

"I understand."

They walked in and passed the checkpoints without incident. After changing in the locker room, they headed for the commissary to find Cam and Carolyn having breakfast together. Sam was in the food line getting a yogurt and some toast.

"Hey, Teal'c. General, sir. Care to join us?" Cam pulled out a chair for O'Neill while Teal'c headed for the trays. "Did you have a nice Thanksgiving?"

O'Neill looked at Cam and said, "Yes, until last night, everything was peachy."

"Uh oh. Trouble at the house?" Cam passed a look at Carolyn and then waited for Jack to answer.

Sam came over and joined them and said, "Did he make it in, yet?"

"No, no sign of him."

"Who? What's going on?" Carolyn looked from Sam to Jack and then she said, "Did Daniel get hurt?"

"You could say that. He and Vala aren't getting along and she moved out."

Jack moved his chair over so Teal'c could fit in and took the coffee Teal'c offered him. "Thanks, T."

"You are welcome, O'Neill."

Sam put down her spoon and said, "Vala told me some things and I don't think I have the right to repeat what was said, but neither one of them is happy."

"I had a feeling something was up," Cam said. "He's been quiet lately, and a quiet Jackson ain't normal!"

"Well, I haven't seen him this upset in a long time," Sam said. "I thought he'd turned a corner, he seemed so much happier."

"It all started when Vala got here. I'll never forget the look on his face when she told him she was pregnant and there was a one in ten chance the baby was his. It was priceless." Cam chuckled and then said, "She sure turned his world upside down."

Carolyn added, "To be honest, I didn't like her at first. We couldn't trust her and she lied about everything. Now that I've gotten to know her, I understand why she was acting that way. She had to, to survive. Once I learned to give her a chance, she turned out to be a very sweet person, in her own way. If she leaves, he'll never be the same. "

"So, what do we do?" Jack could barely stand to see Daniel hurting. They'd become like brothers over the years and he would do anything to help him.

They sat quietly for a few minutes, drinking their coffee and wondering how they could help their friends.

Just then, they heard the overhead speaker come on and a disembodied voice say, "SG-1, General O'Neill and Dr. Lam report to the briefing room, immediately."

Sam finished her last bite of toast and stood. "So much for breakfast."

As they left, Carolyn thought she was glad she'd spent last evening at the movies with Cam, but now she was really curious about what happened with her friends. They all met in the elevator and headed down to level 27.

0 0 0

When they met in the briefing room, they only had to wait for a few minutes for Vala to come in. They could see General Landry on the phone in his office.

Cam said, "I wonder what's going on?"

"I don't know," Vala said. "I was in my quarters when I got a call to come here." She looked around the room and then said, "Where's Daniel?"

"Good question. He should be here already." Jack looked worried as he noticed the time on the wall clock.

"I have a bad feeling about this." Sam made eye contact with Jack and noticed that he was tapping the table with a pencil, a sure sign of nervousness for him.

Vala quietly made her way to one of the chairs around the table and when Hank saw that they were all assembled, he came in.

"I wanted you all together to hear this. Doctor Jackson has been in a car accident and he's at the Academy Medical Center. I don't have all the facts but it seems he had just pulled out of the Starbuck's on Main when he was hit from behind by a city bus. The driver said she never saw him. Witnesses said he had his signal on to turn right and the bus driver never even slowed down. That's all I know."

Jack stood up, "How badly was he hurt?"

"He's listed as critical. I don't have all the facts but I need someone to go down there. Carolyn, do you have a big work load today?"

"No, sir. Doctor Warner came in a while ago and we were going to get caught up on medical reviews for some of the SG teams. It can wait."

"Okay. I need you to get down there and see what you can do. Report back to me as soon as you know something. Jack, would you drive her?"

"Of course. Doctor, let's go!"

Landry looked at the rest of the team and said, "Look, I know you all want to go down there. I won't stop you. You're dismissed."

The group hurriedly left the room and headed for the locker rooms to change and get their coats. Ten minutes later, they were all on their way.

0 0 0

Carolyn was the first one in to the emergency department and asked for the doctor treating Daniel. She was led down the hall and the others were asked to wait in the lobby. Vala paced back and forth and finally Cam took her in his arms, led her to a couch and held her. There wasn't much he could say since they didn't know how serious it was.

About 20 minutes later, Carolyn came out and walked over to them. They all met her half way across the room to see what she had to say.

"From what we can tell, he's got neck injuries from the impact. The airbags didn't help much but that bus had a few tons behind it. He hit his head on the front window and if he hadn't had his seat belt on, he probably would have gone through it. The bus was going about 35 when it hit him. It pushed him through the intersection and crushed his Jeep against a light pole. They had to use the 'Jaws of Life,' to get him out. He has some cracked ribs from impacting the steering wheel. His left lung is punctured. Left shoulder dislocated. Both legs are broken above the knees, his left is a simple fracture but his right was a compound. He was conscious when they brought him and he said he couldn't feel anything below his shoulders. Soon after they brought him in, he passed out. He hasn't come to."

Sam said, "Oh, no. Can we see him?"

"No, not now. They're getting him ready to take him up to Radiology.

Jack said, "Carolyn, he's going to need to be separated from the rest of the ER and put under guard."

"Why?"

"Daniel talks in his sleep. Well… he mostly mumbles but sometimes you can actually understand what he's saying and what he says will probably be classified."

"Okay, let me think about how to handle this and I'll get back with you. Until then, could you stay with him?"

"Sure, no problem."

"The rest of you will have to wait out here. They brought him here because they saw his dog tags, which is good, but we can't move him to the mountain until he's stabilized and that will probably be a while."

"I remember how he balked at wearing the tags. Good thing we talked him into it," Sam said as she wiped her eyes with a tissue.

"Jack, follow me. I'll let the rest of you know any news, as soon as I get any."

Sam went to sit next to Vala who was weeping quietly.

"It's all my fault. If I hadn't left this morning, he wouldn't have had any reason to leave when he did." She was shaking badly and the tears were streaming down her face. "Oh, Sam!"

Sam hugged her close and said, "Shhhh. He's gonna be okay, you'll see. He's had worse things happen to him and came out just fine." Sam hoped she was right.

They returned to the lobby chairs and settled in for the long wait.

0 0 0

Doctor Lam checked the films again. There was no doubt about it, Daniel was paralyzed but his neck wasn't broken and his spinal cord was not severed. There was no indication of stroke. That left swelling of the tissues around the cord, which means it should be temporary.

She went into the ER and found room 18, where Jack was situated. "What's the news, doc?"

"Not good but it could be worse. I'm pretty sure the paralysis is caused by the swelling around his spinal column. C1 through C7 have some trauma around them but nothing is broken. The cervical collar should prevent any further damage until he's better. He has internal injuries, but mostly to his kidneys, which are both bruised. Doctor Emerson is going to do surgery to set his right leg."

"He should be okay, though?"

"I think so. His left hand has some broken bones and his wrist is sprained. He's a mess, sir, but he should mend. He's in surgery now getting the tear in his lung repaired. I know it sounds bad but strangely enough, he's the lucky one. Two cars hit the bus after it pushed Daniel into the light pole. Both drivers were dead on the scene. The bus driver had just started her shift and she said she was tired. Fell asleep at the wheel and ran the light. If there had been people on board…"

"Scary thought, huh?"

"Yeah, it could have been a LOT worse. As far as the security problem goes, I've talked to the Chief of Staff, Doctor Jablonski, and he's agreed to let me be in charge of his primary care and I can bring in some of the nurses from the mountain. They're going to set up a private suite on the 4th floor where we can keep an eye on him until he can be moved."

0 0 0

Carolyn left Jack to wait and went back to the lobby. The team rushed to her and she noticed that her dad had shown up. He gave her a hug and said, "How's he doing?"

"So far, he's still listed as critical but he should get upgraded to 'serious' if he continues to improve. I just checked on the surgical floor and they said that the tear in his lung was small and they managed to get it sown up without too much trouble. His legs should be fine. The neurosurgeon doesn't think he needs a halo but they don't want him moving so they're going to keep him sedated for a bit and see if the swelling goes down around the spinal column. He's in a neck brace and he's secured so that he can't move. Now we just have to wait and see."

"Can we see him?" Vala felt a lot of guilt about the last conversation she'd had with Daniel and now she just couldn't go home.

I'll let you all in to take a peek when he comes out of recovery. Five minutes. Then you have to go. Vala, you can stay if you're quiet and keep out of everyone's way."

Vala nodded, relieved that she wouldn't be forced to leave.

He's going to be in room 472 when he comes out of recovery. That's a suite in the Surgical ICU. There's a sitting room in there where you can all park yourselves. I'll let you know when you can see him. I'm gonna head back."

Cam squeezed her hand and watched her walk back down the hall. General Landry noticed but didn't say anything. He just smiled a bit and went back to the lobby with the others to gather their coats and head for the 4th floor waiting room.

0 0 0

Jack was pacing back and forth in the hallway, waiting for the gurney carrying Daniel. Every time the doors opened at the end of the hall, he jumped, thinking it was him.

"You're gonna wear a rut in the floor, Jack," Sam said as she approached, carrying a much needed cup of coffee.

"Thanks," he said as he accepted her offering and took a sip. "You'd think I would be used to this by now. How many times have we done this? Waited for Danny to come out of surgery? The kid must hold a record for injuries, or something."

"I know. I don't like it either. But, it sounds like he's' gonna make it."

"I hope so. I called Hammond. He said to tell the 'Space Monkey' that he's thinking of him."

Sam looked surprised. "Space Monkey? He actually called him that?"

Jack grinned, "No, those are my words. You know Hammond. He actually said, 'Our boy.'"

"That sounds more like him." Sam smiled and rubbed Jack's back in that slight depression between the shoulder blades.

They leaned against the door frame to the waiting room, watching as Vala sat in the corner of the couch, staring at the T.V. It didn't look like she was really watching it, her mind seemed miles away.

Jack pushed himself away and headed back towards the nurses station. He looked over at Sam and said, "You wanna tell me what's been going on with those two lately?"

"I'm not sure, myself. Vala told me last night that they don't talk much anymore. He's very distant. She decided that it was time to leave. She couldn't stand the mixed messages. One minute he wants to kiss her, the next he's avoiding her."

Jack said, "Sounds like he's in love but he doesn't wanna be. He said that she told him she was leaving and that he figured he drove her off. I don't think he wanted to. It just kinda happened."

"Yeah, that about sums it up."

Seconds later, the double doors to the unit swung open and they watched as a hospital bed, surrounded by all kinds of machines, equipment and medical staff came through it. Jack and Sam hurried in that direction and stood off to the side as they watched the bed being rolled into room 472. It had to be Daniel but it was hard to tell. The others came out of the waiting room and stood back to watch as the doors to the room closed.

Carolyn came into the unit a few minutes later and said, "He came through surgery just fine. It's gonna be a while before he wakes up. We should know more then. I still want someone with him at all times. I've called Nurse Evans to get a team together and they should be here soon."

The doors opened and some of the nursing staff left the room, leaving two nurses who were checking the monitors. Carolyn said, "Vala, you can come in to his room. There's a chair on the other side that you can sit in. The rest of you can stay here in the sitting room. Better yet, you can go back to the base, if you want. He won't be awake for a while so you might as well go back to work. I'll call you if anything happens. As soon as we can, we'll move him to the base."

She noticed the looks they were giving her and then said, "Okay, just don't get in the way."

They stepped inside, crossed the sitting room and looked inside Daniel's room. He was there, beneath all the wires, tubes, gauze and machines- the sound of the respirator was whispering quietly and the heart monitor was keeping track, a reassuring, steady sound.

Sam drew near and noticed that Daniel's face was bandaged and he was barely recognizable. His eyes were swollen shut and the skin was almost black from the bruising. She could see that his left shoulder and chest were also black and blue and his left hand was wrapped in gauze. A sheet was over his legs but she knew they'd been immobilized. "Oh Daniel, when are you going to learn to duck?" Tears slowly slid down her face as she carefully leaned over to kiss his forehead. She turned and walked towards the door to give room for Teal'c to take her place. He stood silently, as if in prayer, and then turned away.

General Landry looked on from the end of the bed. "Keep me posted, Carolyn. I have to get back to the base. The rest of you are on down time until further notice."

"Thank you, sir," Cam said from his place beside the bed.

Jack stood on the other side behind Vala, his hands on her shoulders. He noticed that she silently wept and drew her against his chest and said, "He's got the best care, Vala. He'll pull through, you'll see." She nodded and then sat in the chair and reached for Daniels right hand and held it gently.

The others turned away to give Vala some privacy and went into the sitting room to start their vigil.

_AN: Obviously, I know nothing about medical procedures except for what I've seen on T.V. So, if this is incorrect, please forgive. If anyone wants to let me know what I've done wrong, feel free to let me know. I based some of this on personal experience with a family member who had a similar neck injury, except he did have a stroke caused when he hit his head on the edge of a counter top after passing out from low blood pressure._


	8. Blue Bayou

Chapter Eight: Blue Bayou

The sand was warm and felt good between his toes as he walked along the deserted beach. Palm trees whispered in the breeze and the waves were breaking gently along the spotless, virgin shoreline. The sky was mostly clear, there were only a few clouds off in the distance along the horizon. Gulls and terns flew overhead and danced on the breeze. He could smell the salty tang of the ocean and the sweet perfume from the exotic flowers that grew in wild profusion on the hill behind him. He'd never seen such clear, blue water before. The ocean was unpolluted and he could see dolphins leaping in a cove to his left. To the right, the beach went on and on.

He wasn't wearing much, only a loin cloth made of some soft material- maybe linen. His well muscled body was brown from exposure to the sun's warm rays and the wind ruffled his hair, which had gone blond at the tips and had grown a little bit longer than he was used to. He didn't need his eyeglasses to see and was surprised that he wore no contacts on his bright blue eyes.

"Where am I?" He was sure he'd never been here before. He would have remembered this. "It's a nice place but…" He looked around to see if he was alone. He was, so far as he could see, so he turned to his right and headed towards the trees. The path led into the cooler environs of a Equatorial forest. Tropical fruit trees were scattered about and Macaws chirped from branches, high above. A path led deeper and deeper into the foliage and the sky was blotted out, leaving diamonds of sunlight dancing across the forest floor.

After a while, he could see a clearing ahead and as he crested a hill, he saw a mountain in the distance, covered with lush, green vegetation. He continued to look around but could see no signs of human life. A stream of cool water gurgled along to his left so he knelt down, cupped his hands and drank deeply. He heard a thunderous sound coming from somewhere upstream so he followed the noise to another clearing to find a magnificent waterfall cascading down the side of an outcropping of rock. It splashed into a deep aquamarine pool and as he stepped into the water he found it warm to the touch and very inviting. He stripped of his loin cloth and dove in, experiencing a rush as the silky water glided over his body. He could see fish swimming about and sea weed graced the bottom of the pool, waving like strands of long hair. He surfaced and reveled in the relaxing atmosphere that surrounded him.

Sitting on a rock near the edge of the pool was a frog. It looked like any ordinary frog except for the fact that it opened up it's mouth and said, "Darling, I think I'm pregnant and there's a one in ten chance it's yours."

Daniel looked at the frog and said, "Not unless you're under some spell and you're really a woman."

"How do you know that you're not the one under some spell and you're really a frog?"

That answer surprised him. He blinked and the frog was gone.

"I'm definitely not in Kansas anymore, as Jack would say."

He turned and swam back across the pool and then floated on his back for a while, watching the clouds in the sky. The sound of the waterfall and the smell of the wild flowers lulled him into a feeling of complacency and growing weary, he stepped from the pool, found a spot of thick grass and sat down against a palm tree. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

There was a slight hissing sound coming from somewhere nearby and a slow steady beeping that confused him as he slowly came to the surface of awareness. A tube down his throat made it impossible to speak and he couldn't move or see. He started too panic and soon heard the voice of someone talking to him. He heard the beeping sound speed up and realized it was a heart monitor that he was hooked up to.

"Daniel, don't panic! You're in the Academy hospital. Can you open your eyes?"

He tried but they felt so heavy and he only managed to open them a tiny bit before he closed them again.

Carolyn noticed mere slits as he tried but that was all. A tear rolled from the corners of each eye and she figured he must be in some pain.

"That's okay. You have a lot of swelling and that's what's making it difficult to open them. You're hooked up to a respirator and we need to leave you on it for a little while yet. Try not to fight it. Can you squeeze my hand?"

He tried but it felt impossible. He managed to lightly tap Carolyn's hand with his index finger and then gave up.

She smiled at him and said, "That's good, Daniel. You're getting the feelings back in your limbs. It's gonna take time but we have a lot of that, so don't worry. I'm going to give you some pain medication and it will probably make you sleep. You're doing fine. You just need some rest." She injected some morphine into the IV line and watched as his heart beat slowed a bit and he fell back to sleep.

Vala stood to the left and watched his struggle. When he drifted back to sleep, she sat down, relieved. "Thank the god's, he's coming back!"

"Yes, he is. I'm encouraged that he can move his finger. It's a very good sign. He's stronger than I gave him credit for. It's only been 24 hours."

Jack was standing at the end of the bed and said, "That's our Danny, the original Come Back Kid!"

Carolyn smiled and said, "From what I've read in his medical file, I would have to agree. He's come through over and over again."

Jack said, "I know. I could tell you stories about him that would curl your hair."

"Well, you should all go get some breakfast. Maybe then go home for showers and clean clothes. He's gonna be out for a while. I promise to call you if he's starts to wake up, but it shouldn't happen for some time."

"Come on, Vala. Time to get a little exercise and something to eat." Jack took her hand and led her towards the door. "We'll be back."

They went into the sitting room and woke the rest of the gang up. "Hey, children, time to wake up!"

"I am not a child, O'Neill." Teal'c rose from a sitting position along the wall.

"Yeah, I know, you're twice as old as me."

"Has there been any improvement?" Sam sat up on the couch and tried to smooth down her hair.

"Yes," Vala said. "He was awake for a few minutes. And he could move his finger. Dr. Lam thinks he's better." The smile on her face was contagious and the whole gang looked happy to hear it.

"That's wonderful news! Can we see him?"

"Not now, Sam. Carolyn gave him some pain meds and he's out. She said she'd call us if he woke up. Let's all head for the cafeteria for breakfast."

"Sounds good to me, sir," Cam said. "I need to get the kinks worked out of my back. That recliner chair is nice but I don't think it's meant to be slept in.

They slowly made their way down the hall towards the elevator, feeling much better than they had when they'd arrived the day before.

0 0 0

He woke up under the palm tree and stretched his arms and legs. He was hungry so he donned his loin cloth and went in search for food.

'I guess I don't really need to dress but I wouldn't want to scare the natives, if there are any. Or the frogs.' He laughed quietly to himself at that thought.

He found some bananas and pineapples and filled up on the sticky, sweet fruit and then headed back to the pool to wash his face and hands. He sat on a rock with his feet dangling in the water and tried to make sense of things. How he got here was a mystery but he was sure he hadn't gated here.

He looked up to see that the sky was growing dark and he could hear the sound of thunder in the distance. 'I better find some shelter,' he thought as he looked around. The trees blocked his view so he wasn't sure which way to turn. The wind was starting to pick up and he could feel the first drops of rain hit his face and chest. He ran to the opposite side of the pool and scanned the surface of the cliff. It looked like there was a cave about 25 feet up and if he was careful, he could climb a rocky path that looked like it led to it. It started pouring as he made his way up managing to get most of the way there before he slipped and scraped the side of his ankle on a slippery, rain soaked boulder. The pain was sharp and took his breath away for a moment but he ignored it and finished the trek to the cave opening. He turned to look at the ground below and found that the torrential downpour blocked his view. He turned and walked through a cleft in the rock and found a dry spot to sit and wait things out. His ankle throbbed in time with his heartbeat and was bleeding freely but it didn't look too bad. He sat on the ground, his back to a rock and before long, he was sleeping.

0 0 0

Carolyn noticed a change in Daniel's monitors, indicating he was possibly waking up. She leaned over him and said, 'Daniel, can you hear me?"

Daniel's eyes seemed to open a crack and his blue orbs peered at her from behind his long eyelashes. 'Okay, I'm back in the infirmary,' he thought. He could feel Carolyn's hand on his shoulder and noticed that she had her trusty pen light out.

After checking his eyes, she said, "I think we can take you off the respirator." She turned to the nurse and said, "I'm gonna need your help with this. I want you to watch the monitors while I extubate him."

She looked Daniel in the eyes and said, "This is gonna hurt. A lot. But I want you to stay calm. Once we get this thing out, I can guarantee you'll feel better."

It only took a few seconds and then she was finished. The pain was awful! His lungs felt like they were on fire and his throat felt scraped raw.

"Okay, Nurse, I want you to send General O'Neill in now, please."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Carolyn could see that Daniel was in a lot of pain. She went into the bathroom and came out with a warm, wet washcloth and wiped his face. "Feel better?"

Daniel smiled but didn't try to talk.

Jack was soon there and grinning from ear to ear to see Daniel was breathing on his own.

"Sir, I think it's time to get the nursing crew from the mountain in, now that Daniel will be able to talk."

"Okay, sounds like a plan." He walked over to the side of the bed and looked down at his friend. "Hey, Daniel. Good to see you're back."

Daniel looked up at him in confusion. He managed to croak out, "What happened?"

"You got hit by a bus. Well, your Jeep did. Do you remember any of it?"

"No," he whispered. He made eye contact with Carolyn and said, "When?"

"Friday. It's Sunday morning. Let me explain some things to you. You've had a severe neck injury. It's best described as a sprain. The muscles around the spinal cord in your neck swelled up. You were paralyzed for a couple of days but the feeling in your limbs is slowly coming back. Do you remember my asking you to wiggle your toes this morning?"

"No."

"That's okay. You were on some heavy duty pain killers. I've eased off on the morphine and added acetaminophen. I'm sure you know the routine, Daniel. If you need more, press the button on the pump. It won't allow you to overdose."

"Okay." He was tired and fighting sleep. "Can't rest."

"Let me guess, weird dreams?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, since I've lowered the dose, you shouldn't have any more problem with that. If you do, tell me and we can try something else. Right now, you need your sleep so no visitors for a while. Just relax."

"Jack?"

"He can stay.

"Vala?"

"Do you want her to come in?"

"Yes."

"Fine, but I want you to sleep. No trying to stay awake to visit." She knew that they needed to talk about their problems, but that would have to wait.

"Okay." But, before Vala could enter the room, he was already out.

She asked how he was doing.

"He's in some pain but I think I took care of it. What he needs right now is rest. I don't want him to get anxious about anything. Okay?"

Vala looked at her and the silent message of "It can wait," was broadcast from Carolyn very clearly. For now, she would keep quiet about her leaving him.

0 0 0

Daniel slept most of Sunday and Carolyn noticed that he did talk in his sleep a bit but it was mostly in some language she couldn't identify. She asked Vala if she knew what he was saying.

"He's going through his desk, looking for something, by the sounds of it."

Carolyn smiled. "He's a workaholic. He needs to find a hobby."

Jack said, "I tried to talk him into stamp collecting but he said he thought it was boring. This, coming from a guy who can sit for hours and look at rocks. Go figure."

0 0 0

On Monday, Daniel was more alert and seemed to need less pain meds. Carolyn came into his room after her medical rounds and said, "I'm gonna try raising you to a sitting position and let's see what happens."

She pushed the button on the side of the bed and watched Daniel carefully as he was slowly raised but still laying back.

"How does that feel?"

"Okay, I guess."

"Good. Daniel, we haven't talked much about what happened to you. So, let me tell you what's been going on. You were hit by a city bus on Friday morning. You had just pulled out of the Starbuck's on Main. Sound familiar, yet?"

"It wouldn't be the first time." He smiled at her.

She smiled back at him and said, "Right, I forgot about your coffee addiction. You probably live at Starbuck's. Well, right after you turned, the bus plowed into your Jeep. It pushed you into a light pole."

"Sorry, Danny." Jack said. "The Jeep's a gonner."

Daniel didn't say anything. He was trying to remember the accident but nothing was coming to mind.

"Okay, You've got a concussion, which is hardly surprising since you just about went through the front window. Lots of cuts on your scalp. The medics said that you landed on the dash and that when the engine got pushed into the front seat, you got pushed back and the dash pinned your legs against the seat. So, you ended up with two broken legs. Your right leg had to be repaired surgically. Three broken fingers on your left hand. You also have a sprained left wrist and a dislocated left shoulder. Broken ribs and a punctured lung, also on that side, which we repaired surgically. And, both your kidneys are bruised."

Jack winced, "Too much information, Doc."

"Sorry, but most people want a thorough explanation."

Daniel said, "She's right. It explains a lot." He looked at his bandaged left hand and said, "Is this going to be okay?"

"I'm sure it is. You were paralyzed for a while, so let's see if you can grip my fingers?"

She held her hand in front of him and he reached over with is right hand, grasped it and squeezed slightly. Then she moved down to the end of the bed and lifted the blanket, exposing his feet. She rubbed his foot and said, "Can you feel that?"

"Yeah, and it feels wonderful."

She smiled and said, "See, you're already doing a lot better. You're probably gonna be transferred to the mountain tomorrow, barring any unforeseen complications."

Daniel closed his eyes and seemed to drift. Carolyn wondered if he was falling back to sleep until he opened his eyes and said, "What happened to the bus driver?"

"She fell asleep at the wheel, that's why she hit you. She was thrown through the window and ended up with a broken right arm. It's amazing, really. Some cuts and bruises but she's gonna be fine."

"Anyone else hurt?"

Carolyn hesitated. She knew this was going to bother him and wondered about waiting to tell him the rest.

He noted her hesitation and said, "Tell me."

"The drivers of two other vehicles hit the bus and both died."

Daniel closed his eyes again and swore quietly.

Jack said, "Daniel, they never knew what happened. The cops said they were doing about 45 and died instantly from the impact. And there were no passengers on the bus. It could have been worse."

"I guess."

He looked upset so Carolyn decided to change the subject. "You've got a bunch of people in the other room who want to come in and say 'hello.' Are you up to it?"

"Yeah. I think so."

"Okay, before they come in, tell me something. On a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst, where's your pain level right now?"

Daniel thought about it for a few seconds and then said, "Seven."

"Okay. We'll try you on something different for the pain. I'll go get something and while I'm gone, your friends can come in. Meanwhile, I want you to be extremely careful with your neck. The brace should help keep it from moving but I want you to remember to try to keep still."

Daniel looked worried until she added, "Don't worry, the swelling is down and you're gonna be fine. But, this is like no neck pain you've ever had before so it will hurt less if you don't move. Okay?

"Okay."

She left and Jack looked over at him. "It's good to have you back, Daniel. We were worried about you."

"Sorry."

"Hey, don't be. It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. Do you need anything?"

"Some water. And, my glasses."

Jack reached over to the bed side table and got them for him. Daniel tried to put them on with his uninjured hand but the needle from the IV in his arm was making it a bit difficult so Jack helped him. Then he held up a cup with a straw in it.

After taking a drink, Daniel said, "Thanks."

"No problem."

The door opened and Sam, Teal'c and Cam came into the room.

Daniel accepted the kiss from Sam and nods from Cam and Teal'c.

"You look a lot better than the last time I saw you." Cam handed him the newest 'Archaelogy Today' and said, "I checked your mail and thought you might want it."

"Thanks."

Teal'c asked, "Do you require anything else, Daniel Jackson?"

"I can't think of anything."

"How are you feeling? I know, dumb question." Sam smiled. "Had to ask."

"I'm okay. The pain meds are helping. Except for the weird dreams."

"Oh, yeah?" Jack looked interested.

"Yeah, I was on a deserted island. Palm trees, waterfalls, lagoons."

"Scantily clad women?" Jack grinned.

"Not unless you count the frog."

"What?"

"Believe me, you had to be there."

They each gave him a puzzled look, especially Teal'c. Daniel grinned. The look on Jack's face was priceless.

Daniel looked around and then asked, "Where's Vala. Did she leave?"

"No," Jack said, "she's in the other room. She wanted to give us a chance to see you first. She hasn't left your side for three days. We practically had to drag her out of here to get her to eat. She slept in that chair over there in the corner."

"Would you guys give me a few minutes alone with her? Please?"

Sam said, "Sure, we'll be back later." She gave his fingers a squeeze and then turned to leave. The others said they were glad to see him and then left.

A few minutes later, Vala came in and shut the door behind her. She walked over to the side of the bed and took Daniel's right hand in hers.

He looked into her eyes and said, "I'm glad you're here."

"I couldn't go. I had to see you through this."

He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb and said, "I'm sorry."

"Daniel, we need to talk about this, but not until you're better."

"That could be a while."

"It can wait. I'm not going anywhere."

"Okay, but could you answer just one question?"

"Maybe." She looked a bit uncomfortable.

He waited for a few seconds, trying to come up with just the right words. "Can you forgive me for being a selfish idiot? And, can you understand that I have my reasons for the things I do?"

She smiled and said, "That's two questions and yes, I can forgive you and try to understand. Can I ask you the same two questions?"

"The answer is 'yes' and 'yes'. We can talk about the rest, later, Vala. For now, let's call a truce."

"Well, that's a good place to start over." She leaned over and gave him a light kiss. He smiled and drifted off to sleep with a feeling of hope in his heart.


	9. I Think I Love You

Chapter Nine: I Think I Love You!

"Do you love me?"

"I don't know."

"Do you believe you ever could?"

He didn't answer her.

Tears slid down her face and she looked at him and said, "When you can answer that question, let me know. I'll be back. Until then, I'll be at the base." She turned and walked out of the room and possibly out of his life.

Daniel closed his eyes and wished he knew what to say to her to get her to stay. _'Why can't I just believe that things will work out? That nothing bad will happen?'_

_'Because, you know in your heart that things don't always work out the way you want, Jackson.'_

_'Oh great, here I go talking to myself again.'_

_'And, you better make a decision. If you don't, you'll lose her anyway. Can you withstand the pain if she leaves?'_

He hoped he wouldn't have to find out.

0 0 0

Daniel woke up, gasping for air, and realized that it had been another dream. He was flat on his back, his mind was in a fog and his mouth was dry. The heart monitor was beeping along as a quick pace and soon the nurse was at his side.

"Are you okay, Doctor Jackson? Your heart's beating a bit fast."

"I'm fine."

She smiled. He always gave that answer, no matter what the circumstances were. He'd been hit by a bus, for heaven's sake, and he was 'fine.' She asked if he needed anything.

"Okay, to be honest, I did have a bad dream. But, I've also got a back ache from laying in the same spot for so long."

"Okay, let's sit you up at bit. Would you like some water?"

"Thanks."

The IV had been removed the day before so he was able to hold the cup himself.

"Better?"

"Yes, thanks Tammy."

"You're welcome. I'm going to sit you up all the way and then lower the bed back down, but I want you to stay sitting, okay? I can give you a back rub to loosen up those sore muscles."

That didn't sound so bad, he thought. She lowered the bed, got out some lotion and then pulled open the back of his gown. As she worked on his lower back he groaned and said, "You should have been a masseuse."

"I was certified as a massage therapist before I went to nursing school. I figured it might help my patients."

"You got that right." He closed his eyes and tried to ignore the thought that he had a beautiful blond standing next to him with her hands all over him.

"Your back feels like it's one solid knot. And, you're a bit warm. How are you feeling right now? And, be honest."

Daniel closed his eyes and thought about it for a minute. "Actually, not too good."

She got out her electronic thermometer and put it in his ear. "101.2. You're right, not good." She checked his pulse to find it was running a little fast. His blood pressure was 170/95. "I'll be back in a minute."

She returned with Doctor Warner who began to feel the lymph glands in Daniel's neck. Then he pulled back the sheet and checked the left leg. After probing around the incision on Daniel's thigh, he said, "Here we go, looks like you've got an infection. Nurse, I want you to hook him back up with an IV and some Keflex. Check is BP every 15 minutes. Temp and pulse every 30. Hopefully, we can get this taken care of before it really becomes a problem."

"Yes, sir."

He could hear them talking quietly as they walked over to the other side of the room. _'I wonder if there's more to this and Warner's telling me?'_

They came back with the IV and Tammy said, "I'm going to put this in the top of your right hand. That way, you'll be able to use your arm better." When she was finished, she got out some antibiotic ointment and applied it to the incision on his leg and then re-wrapped it.

Doctor Warner came around the other side of the bed and checked Daniel's pulse. "I'm gonna check on you in an hour. Try to get some rest."

After he left, Tammy said, "How about I finish that back rub and then we can get you tucked in."

"Sounds good."

She was working on his shoulders, and said, "So, where is everyone? Usually you have one or two people in here, sitting with you."

He winced when she hit a sore spot where his shoulder had been dislocated. "I told them I was okay by myself. I could see they weren't getting any rest sitting around here. They'll be back in the morning."

"It's already morning," she said as she started to tie the back of his gown together.

"Yeah, you know what I mean." His eyes were starting to droop. "Don't tell me you gave me something in that IV that'll make me sleep."

"Dr. Warner ordered ordered it for you. You need your rest, sir. It's only 02:00, now. You should go back to sleep."

She got him settled back into the bed and checked his vitals again. He was already asleep when she took his chart and pulled the curtain as she walked away.

0 0 0

In the morning, Carolyn came in and said, "Good morning, Daniel. How are you feeling this today?"

"With my fingers," he said and then smiled at her as shes rolled her eyes.

She reached over and took his pulse. "Doctor Warner told me you started running a fever overnight. How are you feeling right now?"

"I'm tired."

"I bet."

"I heard you didn't eat much for breakfast."

"Have you ever tried the food here?"

"It's not that bad. You have to eat to get well." She adjusted the IV and then checked his blood pressure. "Well, your BP's a little better. Pulse is good and strong but your temp is still up a little bit. If it comes down, we can move you this afternoon."

"Do you have to? At least here I have windows to look out of. The infirmary is boring."

"I can't help that. I want you to rest. Drink as much water as you can- that'll help with the fever and infection. I want to check your neck so sit still." She moved him into a sitting position, unstrapped the brace and felt around under his jaw and around his throat. "How does that feel?"

"Sore." He watched her as she looked him over.

"I'm going to let you keep the brace off for a bit and we'll see how you do without it. The swelling around the spinal cord is completely down. You're just gonna be sore for a while. You're actually pretty lucky, Daniel. Your head hit the wind shield but somehow missed the light pole. Otherwise, you'd either be dead or a quadriplegic."

"I know. I guess the air bags can only do so much. Jack said my Jeep is half it's normal size."

"Yeah, I saw pictures of it on the news. It's amazing that they got you out of there alive."

"It was on the news?"

"Yep. All three local channels. Sam told me that there was a 911 call immediately after the crash. Somebody in the crowd new emergency first aid and they were able to get to you right away. Do you remember any of it?"

"Thankfully, no."

She lowered the bed back and said, "Thank God for small mercies." She turned and headed for the nurse's station and saw Cam coming down the hall carrying a sack from McDonald's.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself. What's in the sack?

"Breakfast. I brought Jackson something to eat. Have you ever tried the food here?" He stuck his finger in his mouth, pretending to gag.

"Are you two connected telepathically?" She couldn't believe he'd said the same words Daniel had said!

"What?"

"Never mind."

"We moving him, today?"

"Probably. He's developed an infection in his leg and he's running a low fever but he's doing better."

"Can I see him?"

"Yes, but he needs his rest so take it easy on him."

"Want to go out for lunch, today? My treat?"

"Maybe."

Cam grinned at her and then walked into Daniel's room. He noticed his friend was awake and staring out the window. The sky was gray and it was snowing big, fat flakes that were sticking to the trees and bushes. It was depressing.

"Hey, Jackson. Doc says you're not feeling so good."

"Just a slight set back. I'm fine."

He set down a sack and said, "Hungry? I brought you an Egg McMuffin."

Daniel looked at him and said, "Thanks. Got any coffee?"

Cam pulled two cups from the bottom of the sack and set one down on Daniel's table. "Decaf."

Daniel glared at him. "And, I suppose you got the real stuff?"

"If I brought you in some High Octane, Lam would have me strung up by my thumbs!"

"Yeah, I suppose you're right. It's just… decaf just doesn't cut it."

"Hey, as soon as she gives the green light, I'll get you a whole thermos full. Until then, be a good boy and eat your sandwich."

Cam sat down in the chair and pulled out an Egg McMuffin for himself and then grabbed the T.V. remote. He turned it to CNN and they watched the latest news.

"I don't know what's more dangerous. Being in Iraq or doing what we do."

"It's a toss up," Daniel said quietly.

"Yeah, I see all the stuff about the suicide bombings and the riots… Makes me glad to be here. If those Army grunts only knew what we do… they wouldn't believe it. Imagine telling them we travel to other planets…"

He looked over to see that his buddy had dozed off. He stood and placed Daniel's sandwich and coffee on the table and pushed it over to the side. Then he sat back and continued to watch the news, keeping vigil over his friend.

0 0 0

Later that day, Carolyn checked Daniel over and then gave the go ahead for him to be moved to the mountain. As the medics came into his room with the gurney, he said, "Do I have to go in that? Can't I just use a wheelchair?"

"No, sir. Dr. Lam said she would prefer you flat on your back."

He raised his eyebrows and his index finger and said, "Umm…"

"Sorry, sir, that wasn't meant the way it sounded. What I should have said was, 'you just lay back and relax'. The trip won't take long, sir."

Tammy adjusted the straps on his neck brace. "This is just until we get you to the infirmary. Dr. Lam's not taking any chances. And Dave's right, sir. Before you know it, we'll have you settled in." They placed the blankets around him and started for the elevator.

Daniel grumbled under his breath but let them do their job. He thought if Sam could smuggle in some translations for him to work on, he might not get bored.

0 0 0

A lot of people had stopped to say 'hello' on his way down to the infirmary. They were glad to have him back and some promised to stop in to see him.

Sam was the first in his room and watched as Carolyn checked him over. "Welcome home."

"Thanks. And, that's a good point. Why can't I go home?" He watched as Carolyn checked his temperature.

"Because you can't get the proper care there. You can't walk yet. You can't use your left hand. You're catheterized. And, you're still fighting off that infection in your leg. I wouldn't be surprised to see your fever return tonight."

Sam said, "Quit being a grump, Daniel"

"I'm not grumpy." Daniel pouted and felt like he was being ganged up on.

Carolyn just shook her head and smiled as she left the room.

"Jack said he'll stop in before he heads to Peterson. He has to get back to D.C. Something about a meeting with the President. Teal'c should be here soon. I haven't seen Vala yet but I'm sure she'll pop in before long. Can I get you anything?"

"My laptop. If I remember correctly, there's a stack of files on my desk that I need to get through. And I'll give you a list of books I need."

"No way. Carolyn said you have to rest." Sam grinned at the pained look on his face. "What? You thought she'd let you work? You know better than that."

"Please, Sam. I can't just sit here and look at these four walls. I'll go crazy from boredom." He looked at her and batted his eyes and she could feel herself cave.

"Okay, let me talk to her and see if she'll allow some light duty stuff." Sam always was a sucker for those baby blues when he was in his vulnerable mode. And he knew just how to push her buttons.

0 0 0

Carolyn said she would allow him to work but afternoons only and three hours, tops. He grumbled a bit but knew he'd better not push it. He was lucky to get that much. He couldn't waste any more time sitting around doing nothing!

Occasionally, one of the SG teams would bring in a document they found on another planet that they thought might help in his search for Merlin's weapon but he wasn't having any luck.

As his legs started to heal, he started hydrotherapy treatments and began physical therapy, as well. It took a few weeks but he was finally up, walking with a walker and was no longer confined to the base. Carolyn assured him that he would make a full recovery and be back through the gate before long.

When he finally went home, he realized he'd been gone almost 2 months. He was extremely grateful for all the help he'd been given and that he'd hired a housekeeping team to clean his house once a week. The men and women were all employees of the mountain who started this business as a way to supplement their incomes and it turned out to be an economic boon for them. Most of the staff at the SGC worked on classified projects and they couldn't take the chance of hiring in just any cleaning company. Some of the SG teams would be gone for days at a time, sometimes on short notice. Not all were married. In fact, most weren't. So, there were times when they needed some additional help with laundry or dishes or yard work- whatever was needed. 'Starlight Home Maintenance' was able to go in and do the work, giving the SGC employees the certain knowledge that they wouldn't have to worry about security matters. They'd all been given security clearances and knew the importance of the confidence their fellow employees had in them.

The place was immaculate and it was nice to be home. He could manage the stairs to his room with the help of a walking cane. It was slow and tiring but he was determined and a stubborn Daniel was a wonder to behold!

Vala did not move back to the house. He decided to let it alone for the time being and knew that they would have to talk about things before she would agree to come home.

She helped him in the office during the days and they kept the chatter light. A few times, he caught her looking at him and it was the same for her. She would look up and find his eyes on her and then he would quickly look away. This had to stop, and soon. They were behaving like lovesick teenagers and it was driving them both crazy. He was starting to snap at her over little things and she'd just about had enough!

And so, she came into his office one afternoon and noticed that Daniel was sitting at his desk, and by the look on his face, he wasn't doing well. She didn't know what to do. Normally, she would be aggressive enough to insist on helping him by just going over and grabbing a bottle of water and handing it to him, along with the Tylenol. Now, she stood frozen, wondering if he would get mad at her if she tried to help.

He'd been in a lot of pain all day. Something just didn't feel right and he couldn't put a label on it, he just knew something was wrong. He looked up and noticed her standing there watching him. It just about broke his heart to see her afraid of him. He'd done this to her. Made her unsure of her feelings and actions. And he felt ashamed of himself for it. He felt very vulnerable and part of it was fatigue and pain, and part of it was the fact that he knew that this conversation was long over due.

"Vala, honey… please come here." He indicated the chair next to his and said, "I think it's time we had a talk."

This scared Vala to no end, but she did as he asked and sat down next to him. _'This is it. It's time to stop bluffing and lay the cards on the table.'_

He took both her hands in his and kissed the top of each one. "I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you. You deserve a hell of a lot better. You stuck around when you didn't want to… You put up with my bad temper and my lousy attitude… I can't blame you if you want to leave."

"I don't want to leave, Daniel. I want to stay but I won't stay where I'm not wanted. And, frankly, I feel like you don't want me here anymore."

He brushed the hair away from her face and said, "And, that's my fault. I've been afraid that if I told you how I felt, something bad would happen to you. I know that sounds crazy but every woman I've gotten involved with has had something bad happen to her. Sha're died because of me."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Do you really believe that? Did you call up Apophis and invite him to Abydos to kidnap Sha're? Did you force her to lay still while she was infested with that parasite? Did you tell Hathor to abuse you? Did you tell Shyla to trick you into staying with her by abusing your team members?"

He was dumbfounded. She knew more about his life than he thought she did. He could only stare wide-eyed and listen.

She took him by the hands and said, "Listen to me! You didn't cause those things to happen! Stop kicking yourself over something you had no control of! Apophis kidnapped your wife, not you. Hathor raped you, you didn't ask for it. Shyla got you addicted to the sarcophagus. Until it happened, your team didn't know it was addictive so how could that be your fault? Daniel, stop living in fear! You hardly ever smile. You spend hours alone with your work inside this tomb when you could be out there LIVING! You, of all people, know how dangerous our work is. We could all die on our next mission! How many times have you been blown up, stabbed, zatted, shot with a staff weapon, or DIED?"

He shook his head and whispered, "I don't know. I… don't know."

"Quit dying and live, my Daniel. Live before it's too late!"

Her words struck a nerve with him. He saw the tears glistening in her eyes and he melted. He pulled her into his arms and said, "You're right… You're right." He kissed her hair, her face and then finally her lips. He thought about nothing else except the moment and how wonderful it felt to kiss her, how wonderful it felt to get turned on by her. She smelled wonderful, like wild flowers. She was so warm and it felt so good to hold her close. Nothing else mattered.

He looked her in the eyes and said, "I love you. I can't deny it any longer. I want you, NOW, but we can't do anything about that right here. It's almost quitting time. Let's go home."

"Home?"

"Yes, Vala. Would you come home?"

"It's about time you asked."

They couldn't get there fast enough.


	10. It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christ

Chapter 10: It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

From the personal journal of Daniel Jackson

Feb. 1

Vala. I had feeling, when I met her on _The Prometheus_ that we would be involved in the future. I was right. If anyone had told me that we would end up together, romantically, I would have told them to go see a psychiatrist. And, I was so wrong.

My previous journal entries will show that she has been driving me crazy. I've never been so frustrated by anyone in my whole life. She's been a constant thorn in my side and an embarrassment to the SGC. And, at the same time, I feel like Rip Van Winkle, awakening from a long, long sleep. She's a wonder to me and I didn't know I could feel this way about another woman, since my Sha're died.

When we finally settled our differences and went back to the house together, we found that we had a whole weekend alone. Sam had a seminar to teach in Virginia Beach, VA; Teal'c took the chance to visit Ryac and his family; and Cam went away for the weekend with Carolyn. (I always thought those two looked good together.)

Vala and I started out in the bed, but traversed from there to the hot tub in my master bath, the floor in front of the fireplace on some quilts, and numerous places around the house. (I hope nobody will ever read this!) But, it wasn't all sex. We did a LOT of talking, too, and decided that life is too short (don't I know it!) and if I kept denying how I felt about her, I would miss out on a beautiful relationship with a woman I've decided I can't live without. We still have a lot issues to discuss but at least we're trying. So, there it is. We're officially a 'couple.'

We missed Christmas and New Year's because of my accident (Now I can really say I know what it's like to be hit by a bus!) But, it didn't matter. My 'family' showed up last weekend and we had Christmas, a month late, but it was still special. Cam and Teal'c went out into the woods and chopped down an 18 foot pine tree which they brought back to the house and set it up in the sun room. (It's been a real trial to keep Tut from taking a leak on it, but he seems to be getting the idea.) We decorated it with things they all found on sale after Christmas and a few special things of their own. They had been planning this for weeks and they put everything on hold until they thought I could enjoy it. And, I have to say, I did. It was the first Christmas that I've enjoyed since I was a kid in Egypt with my parents. (I tried to explain Christmas to the Abydonians and they just didn't get it, so I gave up and figured their culture could live without it.)

Our lives are still fraught with danger and we still have to find Merlin's secret weapon to use against Adria the Ori, but at least we have hope. And, for the first time since Jack left, I feel like SG-1 is a team again.

I just heard Vala start the shower so I'll sign off. I've been thinking about taking one with her for quite a while now. (I REALLY, REALLY hope nobody will read this!)

dj

THE END


End file.
